Wondering what group therapy sessions are all about or looking for some mental health group topics? Check out our latest blog for information and tips!
Although it isn’t a treatment for alcohol use disorder (AUD), the Reframe app can help you cut back on drinking gradually, with the science-backed knowledge to empower you 100% of the way. Our proven program has helped millions of people around the world drink less and live more. And we want to help you get there, too!
The Reframe app equips you with the knowledge and skills you need to not only survive drinking less, but to thrive while you navigate the journey. Our daily research-backed readings teach you the neuroscience of alcohol, and our in-app Toolkit provides the resources and activities you need to navigate each challenge.
You’ll meet hundreds of fellow Reframers in our 24/7 Forum chat and daily Zoom check-in meetings. Receive encouragement from people worldwide who know exactly what you’re going through! You’ll also have the opportunity to connect with our licensed Reframe coaches for more personalized guidance.
Plus, we’re always introducing new features to optimize your in-app experience. We recently launched our in-app chatbot, Melody, powered by the world’s most powerful AI technology. Melody is here to help as you adjust to a life with less (or no) alcohol.
And that’s not all! Every month, we launch fun challenges, like Dry/Damp January, Mental Health May, and Outdoorsy June. You won’t want to miss out on the chance to participate alongside fellow Reframers (or solo if that’s more your thing!).
The Reframe app is free for 7 days, so you don’t have anything to lose by trying it. Are you ready to feel empowered and discover life beyond alcohol? Then download our app through the App Store or Google Play today!
You’ve decided that alcohol has been taking more than it’s giving, and it’s time to put it in the background and make room for other experiences. That’s amazing — congrats on taking this important step! Now you’re looking for ways to stay on track and gain momentum in your journey. One of the best ways to do this? Team up with others on the same path!
As basketball coach Mike Krzyzewski observes, something magical happens when like-minded people work together: “The thing I loved the most — and still love the most about teaching — is that you can connect with an individual or a group, and see that individual or group exceed their limits.”
And that’s also true about the alcohol journey! Group therapy is a great way to bring out this magic and watch it transform our life. Let’s explore what therapy groups are all about and dive into some lively recovery group topics for discussion!
Group therapy for alcohol misuse helps people with similar challenges gain insight and receive support by coming together on a regular basis. While they’re often part of residential or intensive outpatient treatment programs, standalone group therapy sessions are common as well. It’s all about learning and growing together in a supportive environment with like-minded folks guided by trained professionals to steer the “sobriety ship”!
There are many types of group therapy out there, and the NCBI Substance Abuse Treatment protocol lists some of the most common types:
Now that we have the lay of the land, let’s dig deeper into the benefits of group therapy from a scientific perspective. Time to discover the power of sharing!
“All of us are mentors. You’re mentors right here and now. And one of the things I’ve always done throughout my life, I have always found that person, that group of people that I was going to reach my hand out and help bring them along with me.” — Michelle Obama
According to the NCBI, group therapy has many benefits:
With all this info about group therapy, you may be wondering what group therapy members actually talk about. Let’s get into it!
Now for the fun part: here are some recovery topics for groups that can spark discussions, lead to insights, and make cutting back on alcohol easier:
As Annie Grace suggests in The Alcohol Experiment, imagine a world in which alcohol is less accepted than it is today. While in reality alcohol “is the only drug on the planet you have to justify not taking,” this doesn’t need to be the case.
How would your experience of quitting or cutting back be different? What would you do instead of drinking? How would celebrations look? Act out some possible scenarios with other group members and feel the sense of freedom this alternative reality brings.
Defining our reasons for change is important when it comes to shifting how we see alcohol and gaining momentum in our journey. Spend some time finding your “why” and share it with other group members.
Be as specific as possible. Maybe you want to make sure your mind is clear and sharp well into old age. Maybe you want to get in physical shape, lose weight, save money for a dream vacation, or have more time to spend with your kids. Defining your own reasons for change — as well as hearing those of others — can be a powerful motivator.
One of the trickiest parts of the alcohol journey is dealing with cravings — intense urges to drink that can hit us when we least expect it. The reason has to do with the fact that alcohol artificially boosts dopamine — the reward neurotransmitter that floods our brain with pleasure and keeps us coming back for more.
There are plenty of natural ways to boost dopamine, and group therapy is a great space to swap advice and share what works. Whether it’s a YouTube kickboxing routine, a creative board game, or an inspiring audiobook that got your dopamine flowing, it’s time to share the joy with others!
Social occasions can be tricky when we’re leaving booze behind, especially if we’re used to relying on it to loosen up. And while sober socializing ultimately leads to more authentic interactions and fulfilling relationships, refusing a drink might feel awkward at the beginning.
Group therapy is the ideal time to practice! Role-playing different scenarios and trying out possible responses can make it easier to do in real life.
Building new habits is essential during the alcohol journey. Habits physically reprogram our brain through the power of neuroplasticity: the more we engage in a certain behavior, the more natural it becomes (for better or worse).
Cutting back on alcohol is a whole lot easier with a healthy daily routine. Why not share the habits that are working for you with others in your therapy group? Maybe it’s writing morning pages, keeping a gratitude journal, or using the Pomodoro technique for productivity. Whatever it is, if it’s working for you — share it with others!
In the end, the alcohol journey is a deeply personal one. However, it’s not meant to be walked alone. There’s tremendous benefit in tapping into the power of the group and making the process less lonely, more effective, and a whole lot more fun.
And remember, Reframe’s supportive community provides the benefits of group therapy right in the palm of your hand! Check out our 24/7 Forum and our small group meetings with coaches and others just like you who’ve been where you are and are now thriving. We’re here for you!
You’ve decided that alcohol has been taking more than it’s giving, and it’s time to put it in the background and make room for other experiences. That’s amazing — congrats on taking this important step! Now you’re looking for ways to stay on track and gain momentum in your journey. One of the best ways to do this? Team up with others on the same path!
As basketball coach Mike Krzyzewski observes, something magical happens when like-minded people work together: “The thing I loved the most — and still love the most about teaching — is that you can connect with an individual or a group, and see that individual or group exceed their limits.”
And that’s also true about the alcohol journey! Group therapy is a great way to bring out this magic and watch it transform our life. Let’s explore what therapy groups are all about and dive into some lively recovery group topics for discussion!
Group therapy for alcohol misuse helps people with similar challenges gain insight and receive support by coming together on a regular basis. While they’re often part of residential or intensive outpatient treatment programs, standalone group therapy sessions are common as well. It’s all about learning and growing together in a supportive environment with like-minded folks guided by trained professionals to steer the “sobriety ship”!
There are many types of group therapy out there, and the NCBI Substance Abuse Treatment protocol lists some of the most common types:
Now that we have the lay of the land, let’s dig deeper into the benefits of group therapy from a scientific perspective. Time to discover the power of sharing!
“All of us are mentors. You’re mentors right here and now. And one of the things I’ve always done throughout my life, I have always found that person, that group of people that I was going to reach my hand out and help bring them along with me.” — Michelle Obama
According to the NCBI, group therapy has many benefits:
With all this info about group therapy, you may be wondering what group therapy members actually talk about. Let’s get into it!
Now for the fun part: here are some recovery topics for groups that can spark discussions, lead to insights, and make cutting back on alcohol easier:
As Annie Grace suggests in The Alcohol Experiment, imagine a world in which alcohol is less accepted than it is today. While in reality alcohol “is the only drug on the planet you have to justify not taking,” this doesn’t need to be the case.
How would your experience of quitting or cutting back be different? What would you do instead of drinking? How would celebrations look? Act out some possible scenarios with other group members and feel the sense of freedom this alternative reality brings.
Defining our reasons for change is important when it comes to shifting how we see alcohol and gaining momentum in our journey. Spend some time finding your “why” and share it with other group members.
Be as specific as possible. Maybe you want to make sure your mind is clear and sharp well into old age. Maybe you want to get in physical shape, lose weight, save money for a dream vacation, or have more time to spend with your kids. Defining your own reasons for change — as well as hearing those of others — can be a powerful motivator.
One of the trickiest parts of the alcohol journey is dealing with cravings — intense urges to drink that can hit us when we least expect it. The reason has to do with the fact that alcohol artificially boosts dopamine — the reward neurotransmitter that floods our brain with pleasure and keeps us coming back for more.
There are plenty of natural ways to boost dopamine, and group therapy is a great space to swap advice and share what works. Whether it’s a YouTube kickboxing routine, a creative board game, or an inspiring audiobook that got your dopamine flowing, it’s time to share the joy with others!
Social occasions can be tricky when we’re leaving booze behind, especially if we’re used to relying on it to loosen up. And while sober socializing ultimately leads to more authentic interactions and fulfilling relationships, refusing a drink might feel awkward at the beginning.
Group therapy is the ideal time to practice! Role-playing different scenarios and trying out possible responses can make it easier to do in real life.
Building new habits is essential during the alcohol journey. Habits physically reprogram our brain through the power of neuroplasticity: the more we engage in a certain behavior, the more natural it becomes (for better or worse).
Cutting back on alcohol is a whole lot easier with a healthy daily routine. Why not share the habits that are working for you with others in your therapy group? Maybe it’s writing morning pages, keeping a gratitude journal, or using the Pomodoro technique for productivity. Whatever it is, if it’s working for you — share it with others!
In the end, the alcohol journey is a deeply personal one. However, it’s not meant to be walked alone. There’s tremendous benefit in tapping into the power of the group and making the process less lonely, more effective, and a whole lot more fun.
And remember, Reframe’s supportive community provides the benefits of group therapy right in the palm of your hand! Check out our 24/7 Forum and our small group meetings with coaches and others just like you who’ve been where you are and are now thriving. We’re here for you!
Why is self-care so important in alcohol misuse recovery? Find out how to give your mind, body, emotions, and spirit some much-needed TLC in our latest blog about self-care in addiction recovery.
Although it isn’t a treatment for alcohol use disorder (AUD), the Reframe app can help you cut back on drinking gradually, with the science-backed knowledge to empower you 100% of the way. Our proven program has helped millions of people around the world drink less and live more. And we want to help you get there, too!
The Reframe app equips you with the knowledge and skills you need to not only survive drinking less, but to thrive while you navigate the journey. Our daily research-backed readings teach you the neuroscience of alcohol, and our in-app Toolkit provides the resources and activities you need to navigate each challenge.
You’ll meet hundreds of fellow Reframers in our 24/7 Forum chat and daily Zoom check-in meetings. Receive encouragement from people worldwide who know exactly what you’re going through! You’ll also have the opportunity to connect with our licensed Reframe coaches for more personalized guidance.
Plus, we’re always introducing new features to optimize your in-app experience. We recently launched our in-app chatbot, Melody, powered by the world’s most powerful AI technology. Melody is here to help as you adjust to a life with less (or no) alcohol.
And that’s not all! Every month, we launch fun challenges, like Dry/Damp January, Mental Health May, and Outdoorsy June. You won’t want to miss out on the chance to participate alongside fellow Reframers (or solo if that’s more your thing!).
The Reframe app is free for 7 days, so you don’t have anything to lose by trying it. Are you ready to feel empowered and discover life beyond alcohol? Then download our app through the App Store or Google Play today!
On TV, self-care rituals and routines are all about bubble baths, massages, and maybe getting your nails done. Just think of Monica from Friends soaking her troubles away in lavender-scented soap bubbles as Enya plays in the background; Elaine from Seinfeld going to her favorite Korean nail salon, and George finding himself unable to part with that oh-so-comfortable massage chair that’s supposed to be a gift for a friend. But there’s so much more to self-care, especially when it comes to recovery! Why is self-care so important? And how can we improve our self-care game in recovery? Let’s find out!
It’s no secret that alcohol misuse wreaks havoc on our lives. While the physical effects are the most obvious, however, the problem goes deeper. Here’s an overview.
This is where self-care comes in! According to the National Institutes of Health, mental health “is more than the absence of a mental illness.” Instead, it’s all about thriving, enjoying our new life, and looking forward to each day when we wake up in the morning. Self-care, in turn, is the way to achieve it. As writer Lalah Delia puts it, “Self-care is how you take your power back.”
How do we go about starting a self-care routine in recovery? It’s helpful to think of it in terms of four areas — our physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health. All four have been affected by alcohol use, and all four are in need of attention.
“Self-care has become a new priority — the revelation that it’s perfectly permissible to listen to your body and do what it needs.” ― Frances Ryan
As we already know, alcohol does a number on our physical health. And while getting it out of our system is the first priority, we can take additional steps to take our recovery to the next level:
In the end, it’s simple: listen to your body and give it what it needs. Without alcohol drowning out your intuition, it’ll be that much easier to hear it clearly.
“The brain is like a muscle; books are the diet and writing is the workout.” ― Stewart Stafford
Ever try to solve a quadratic equation or play a game of chess (or even Tetris) while drinking? Even though we sometimes think booze leads to “brilliant” insights at the moment, the next morning those insights tend to lose their spark (if we even remember them). That’s because alcohol slows down activity in the prefrontal cortex — the reasoning and decision-making hub of the brain — and messes with the hippocampus (which helps us store new memories).
While quitting or cutting back certainly helps us get our smarts back, it will take some time. Here are some self-care practices to help our brain get back in shape:
The key to caring for our mind is finding a technique, activity, or subject to explore that jibes with our interests. Whether it’s playing online chess, brushing up on our Spanish skills by listening to bite-sized Spanish podcasts on the way to work, or finally reading Ulysses, our brain will thank us!
“The chaos around you is none of your business: your business is how you feel about it.” ― Jacinta Mpalyenkana
Remember those emotional storms that alcohol stirs up? Part of self-care in recovery is dealing with them. The most important takeaway is that emotions come and go, even if it might seem like the unpleasant ones will last forever. But while learning to accept them without judgment is the first step, there are self-care practices we can use to help create emotional shifts.
In the end, it’s important to keep in mind that emotions aren’t inherently “good” or “bad.” Seeing them from this neutral perspective, in turn, is often enough to take the sting out of the unpleasant while creating space for profound emotional shifts with the help of the practices in our emotional self-care toolbox.
“The wounded mind must be reset like a fractured bone. It cannot heal itself without spiritual realignment.” ― Anthon St. Maarten
Finally, we come to the spiritual side of things. Alcohol tends to disconnect us from our authentic self, and spiritual self-care is all about finding our way back. It’s kind of like rebooting a faulty GPS app and rediscovering things that feel meaningful and give us a sense of purpose!
Meditation rewires the brain. Meditation is a key part of many spiritual practices, and it can work wonders for getting in touch with our authentic self and tapping into a source of meaning. In fact, it’s a self-care tool that also has physical, emotional, and mental benefits and reinforces all four areas of healing. Plus, it’s a science-backed way to reduce cravings, manage stress, and switch from the “default mode network” associated with habitual, repetitive thinking to one that’s associated with new ideas and insights. Plus, it even increases the volume of the prefrontal cortex and hippocampus, helping us recover our higher-order brain functions and memory — it’s a win-win! (To learn more, take a look at “How Can Meditation Help Me Overcome Alcohol Misuse?”)
Nature has healing powers. One of the easiest sources of spiritual energy to tap into is right there, outside our window (unless we live in a basement apartment — but even then, it’s not too far away). Whether it’s a patch of grass with a tree outside our front door, a city park, or a mountain trail, a natural setting lets us tap into a profound source of peace, sustaining our recovery. And there’s science behind it! Nature relieves both physical and psychological stress, boosts endorphins, and reduces impulsivity, according to studies. (For a deep dive, check out “What Is Ecotherapy? 5 Ways Time in Nature Improves Mental Well-Being.”)
Giving back to others is giving back to ourselves. It’s easy to get stuck in our own mind when we’re stuck in the alcohol trap, and switching our focus to others can help us heal spiritually. Plus, studies show that acts of kindness boost endorphins and oxytocin, making us feel good. They also promote neuroplasticity, helping the brain to rewire and heal itself after alcohol misuse!
Gratitude works wonders. Gratitude shifts our focus from what’s wrong to what’s right — an instant mood booster that helps our spiritual healing. Science shows that practicing gratitude increases dopamine and serotonin levels, promoting joy and reducing stress without alcohol! (To learn more, check out “Gratitude Journal Prompts To Practice Daily.”)
For more information about the spiritual side of recovery, take a look at “Exploring Spirituality In Recovery.”
All in all, it’s important to remember that self-care in recovery isn’t selfish — it’s necessary! As author L.R. Knost writes, “Taking care of myself doesn’t mean ‘me first.’ It means ‘me too’.” And here at Reframe we’re all about helping you get there!
On TV, self-care rituals and routines are all about bubble baths, massages, and maybe getting your nails done. Just think of Monica from Friends soaking her troubles away in lavender-scented soap bubbles as Enya plays in the background; Elaine from Seinfeld going to her favorite Korean nail salon, and George finding himself unable to part with that oh-so-comfortable massage chair that’s supposed to be a gift for a friend. But there’s so much more to self-care, especially when it comes to recovery! Why is self-care so important? And how can we improve our self-care game in recovery? Let’s find out!
It’s no secret that alcohol misuse wreaks havoc on our lives. While the physical effects are the most obvious, however, the problem goes deeper. Here’s an overview.
This is where self-care comes in! According to the National Institutes of Health, mental health “is more than the absence of a mental illness.” Instead, it’s all about thriving, enjoying our new life, and looking forward to each day when we wake up in the morning. Self-care, in turn, is the way to achieve it. As writer Lalah Delia puts it, “Self-care is how you take your power back.”
How do we go about starting a self-care routine in recovery? It’s helpful to think of it in terms of four areas — our physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health. All four have been affected by alcohol use, and all four are in need of attention.
“Self-care has become a new priority — the revelation that it’s perfectly permissible to listen to your body and do what it needs.” ― Frances Ryan
As we already know, alcohol does a number on our physical health. And while getting it out of our system is the first priority, we can take additional steps to take our recovery to the next level:
In the end, it’s simple: listen to your body and give it what it needs. Without alcohol drowning out your intuition, it’ll be that much easier to hear it clearly.
“The brain is like a muscle; books are the diet and writing is the workout.” ― Stewart Stafford
Ever try to solve a quadratic equation or play a game of chess (or even Tetris) while drinking? Even though we sometimes think booze leads to “brilliant” insights at the moment, the next morning those insights tend to lose their spark (if we even remember them). That’s because alcohol slows down activity in the prefrontal cortex — the reasoning and decision-making hub of the brain — and messes with the hippocampus (which helps us store new memories).
While quitting or cutting back certainly helps us get our smarts back, it will take some time. Here are some self-care practices to help our brain get back in shape:
The key to caring for our mind is finding a technique, activity, or subject to explore that jibes with our interests. Whether it’s playing online chess, brushing up on our Spanish skills by listening to bite-sized Spanish podcasts on the way to work, or finally reading Ulysses, our brain will thank us!
“The chaos around you is none of your business: your business is how you feel about it.” ― Jacinta Mpalyenkana
Remember those emotional storms that alcohol stirs up? Part of self-care in recovery is dealing with them. The most important takeaway is that emotions come and go, even if it might seem like the unpleasant ones will last forever. But while learning to accept them without judgment is the first step, there are self-care practices we can use to help create emotional shifts.
In the end, it’s important to keep in mind that emotions aren’t inherently “good” or “bad.” Seeing them from this neutral perspective, in turn, is often enough to take the sting out of the unpleasant while creating space for profound emotional shifts with the help of the practices in our emotional self-care toolbox.
“The wounded mind must be reset like a fractured bone. It cannot heal itself without spiritual realignment.” ― Anthon St. Maarten
Finally, we come to the spiritual side of things. Alcohol tends to disconnect us from our authentic self, and spiritual self-care is all about finding our way back. It’s kind of like rebooting a faulty GPS app and rediscovering things that feel meaningful and give us a sense of purpose!
Meditation rewires the brain. Meditation is a key part of many spiritual practices, and it can work wonders for getting in touch with our authentic self and tapping into a source of meaning. In fact, it’s a self-care tool that also has physical, emotional, and mental benefits and reinforces all four areas of healing. Plus, it’s a science-backed way to reduce cravings, manage stress, and switch from the “default mode network” associated with habitual, repetitive thinking to one that’s associated with new ideas and insights. Plus, it even increases the volume of the prefrontal cortex and hippocampus, helping us recover our higher-order brain functions and memory — it’s a win-win! (To learn more, take a look at “How Can Meditation Help Me Overcome Alcohol Misuse?”)
Nature has healing powers. One of the easiest sources of spiritual energy to tap into is right there, outside our window (unless we live in a basement apartment — but even then, it’s not too far away). Whether it’s a patch of grass with a tree outside our front door, a city park, or a mountain trail, a natural setting lets us tap into a profound source of peace, sustaining our recovery. And there’s science behind it! Nature relieves both physical and psychological stress, boosts endorphins, and reduces impulsivity, according to studies. (For a deep dive, check out “What Is Ecotherapy? 5 Ways Time in Nature Improves Mental Well-Being.”)
Giving back to others is giving back to ourselves. It’s easy to get stuck in our own mind when we’re stuck in the alcohol trap, and switching our focus to others can help us heal spiritually. Plus, studies show that acts of kindness boost endorphins and oxytocin, making us feel good. They also promote neuroplasticity, helping the brain to rewire and heal itself after alcohol misuse!
Gratitude works wonders. Gratitude shifts our focus from what’s wrong to what’s right — an instant mood booster that helps our spiritual healing. Science shows that practicing gratitude increases dopamine and serotonin levels, promoting joy and reducing stress without alcohol! (To learn more, check out “Gratitude Journal Prompts To Practice Daily.”)
For more information about the spiritual side of recovery, take a look at “Exploring Spirituality In Recovery.”
All in all, it’s important to remember that self-care in recovery isn’t selfish — it’s necessary! As author L.R. Knost writes, “Taking care of myself doesn’t mean ‘me first.’ It means ‘me too’.” And here at Reframe we’re all about helping you get there!
Wondering about dual diagnosis treatment options? Our latest blog is all about AUD and co-occurring disorders. Check it out for some science-backed solutions!
Although it isn’t a treatment for alcohol use disorder (AUD), the Reframe app can help you cut back on drinking gradually, with the science-backed knowledge to empower you 100% of the way. Our proven program has helped millions of people around the world drink less and live more. And we want to help you get there, too!
The Reframe app equips you with the knowledge and skills you need to not only survive drinking less, but to thrive while you navigate the journey. Our daily research-backed readings teach you the neuroscience of alcohol, and our in-app Toolkit provides the resources and activities you need to navigate each challenge.
You’ll meet hundreds of fellow Reframers in our 24/7 Forum chat and daily Zoom check-in meetings. Receive encouragement from people worldwide who know exactly what you’re going through! You’ll also have the opportunity to connect with our licensed Reframe coaches for more personalized guidance.
Plus, we’re always introducing new features to optimize your in-app experience. We recently launched our in-app chatbot, Melody, powered by the world’s most powerful AI technology. Melody is here to help as you adjust to a life with less (or no) alcohol.
And that’s not all! Every month, we launch fun challenges, like Dry/Damp January, Mental Health May, and Outdoorsy June. You won’t want to miss out on the chance to participate alongside fellow Reframers (or solo if that’s more your thing!).
The Reframe app is free for 7 days, so you don’t have anything to lose by trying it. Are you ready to feel empowered and discover life beyond alcohol? Then download our app through the App Store or Google Play today!
A young mother worries about her children to the point of daily panic attacks. (“What if he falls out of the crib at night? What if that paint is toxic? What if ...?) Her anxiety has crossed the line of what’s normal for “new mother” concerns — but so has her drinking.
A police officer relives the domestic violence incident he witnessed with flashbacks throughout the day and nightmares when he tries to sleep. He’s also become a regular at the neighborhood bar where he goes to get relief.
A college freshman struggles to stay focused in her large lecture-hall classes and keep up with assignments. Frustrated and on her own for the first time, her drinking is no longer just a weekend thing.
These three people have something in common: they show symptoms of alcohol misuse along with co-occurring disorders — anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). Let’s explore what dual-diagnosis treatment is all about and why 12-step programs such as Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) might not be enough to address their concerns.
Alcohol use disorder (AUD) is a mental health disorder marked by an inability to stop drinking despite alcohol’s negative effects on our lives. When we’re caught in the grips of AUD, all aspects of our lives are affected: our health suffers, our relationships become strained, our performance at work or school declines. And yet, we can’t stop drinking.
While an outside observer might wonder, “Why can’t they just quit?” AUD is more complicated and more common than many people realize. In fact, according to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA), as many as 28.8 million adults in America suffered from AUD in 2021. That’s over 11% of adults aged 18 or older! Picture a subway car with 50 people on board. Chances are, at least five (or more) have had AUD in the past or are currently struggling.
While modern science has made AUD recovery more possible (more on that later), sometimes life throws us for an extra loop. Many of those struggling with AUD have another co-occurring disorder that complicates the picture and makes recovery more challenging. Here are the most common co-occurring disorders, according to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA):
While all these mental health conditions can “team up” with AUD, some are more frequent than others, with anxiety, depression, and PTSD topping the list. However, the relationship between alcohol misuse and co-occurring disorders is often difficult to untangle. Let’s take a closer look at why.
Determining which came first — AUD or other co-occurring disorders — can be a bit of a chicken-and-egg problem. Here’s why, according to NIAAA:
Now that we see why AUD and co-occurring disorders can cause extra trouble together, let’s take a look at the brain changes that come with them. Understanding the neuroscience behind dual diagnosis is the first step in finding the right course of treatment!
AUD and other mental health issues affect our brain chemistry, often exacerbating each other. Here’s how alcohol affects the brain and how other conditions play into these effects:
For more information about co-occurring disorders, check out “Where To Find Help for Mental Health Issues Related to Alcohol Use” as well as “The Positive Impacts of Sobriety on Mental Health: Reduced Anxiety, Depression, and Improved Emotional Well-Being.” For now, let’s turn our attention to why 12-step programs may not be the answer to dual-diagnosis treatment and which alternatives offer a science-based approach.
Those of us who struggle with alcohol may be pointed towards Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) at some point in our journey. After all, this peer-led support program has been around for almost a century! While it has benefits, it’s not for everyone — particularly for those with a dual diagnosis. Here’s why:
While AA does have benefits, when it comes to addressing co-occurring disorders, it’s lacking. That’s where science comes in!
So if AA isn’t the solution to co-occurring disorders, what is? Let’s look at some science-based strategies that can help.
Sometimes a neurochemical imbalance calls for a medical solution. These days, psychiatric medications have improved and can be tailored to our individual needs. And while the decision to go this route is always a personal one, it’s something to consider, especially if our condition is known to benefit from medication-assisted treatment (MAT). For example, antipsychotic medications are often used to treat schizophrenia, while mood stabilizers, antipsychotics, and antidepressants can help even out the highs and lows of bipolar disorder.
As for AUD, there are options for MAT as well! While some reduce alcohol’s psychoactive effects, others act as deterrents by causing unpleasant reactions when mixed with booze or by targeting the root of the problem by reducing cravings. (To learn more, check out “Which Medications Work Best To Help Me Stop Drinking?”)
Just as medical treatment has improved over the years, therapy has grown by leaps and bounds. It’s no longer all about recalling your dreams or childhood memories (though that can be part of the picture if it helps). Here’s an overview of various forms of therapy and how they can work wonders for AUD and co-occurring disorders:
As we can see, the world of therapy has expanded since the days of Freud and his famous couch. It’s time to explore what it can do for our dual-diagnosis treatment journey!
While the dual diagnosis road can be a challenging one, rest assured there’s light at the end of the tunnel! With science at our side, we’re more capable than ever of addressing the complex needs that come with co-occurring disorders.
In the end, many of us find that tackling multiple mental health challenges leaves us better equipped to tackle future obstacles in our path. Seeing the broader context of co-occurring disorders and the neuroscience behind mental health issues calls for a more comprehensive toolbox that we can use for anything the future might throw at us.
A young mother worries about her children to the point of daily panic attacks. (“What if he falls out of the crib at night? What if that paint is toxic? What if ...?) Her anxiety has crossed the line of what’s normal for “new mother” concerns — but so has her drinking.
A police officer relives the domestic violence incident he witnessed with flashbacks throughout the day and nightmares when he tries to sleep. He’s also become a regular at the neighborhood bar where he goes to get relief.
A college freshman struggles to stay focused in her large lecture-hall classes and keep up with assignments. Frustrated and on her own for the first time, her drinking is no longer just a weekend thing.
These three people have something in common: they show symptoms of alcohol misuse along with co-occurring disorders — anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). Let’s explore what dual-diagnosis treatment is all about and why 12-step programs such as Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) might not be enough to address their concerns.
Alcohol use disorder (AUD) is a mental health disorder marked by an inability to stop drinking despite alcohol’s negative effects on our lives. When we’re caught in the grips of AUD, all aspects of our lives are affected: our health suffers, our relationships become strained, our performance at work or school declines. And yet, we can’t stop drinking.
While an outside observer might wonder, “Why can’t they just quit?” AUD is more complicated and more common than many people realize. In fact, according to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA), as many as 28.8 million adults in America suffered from AUD in 2021. That’s over 11% of adults aged 18 or older! Picture a subway car with 50 people on board. Chances are, at least five (or more) have had AUD in the past or are currently struggling.
While modern science has made AUD recovery more possible (more on that later), sometimes life throws us for an extra loop. Many of those struggling with AUD have another co-occurring disorder that complicates the picture and makes recovery more challenging. Here are the most common co-occurring disorders, according to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA):
While all these mental health conditions can “team up” with AUD, some are more frequent than others, with anxiety, depression, and PTSD topping the list. However, the relationship between alcohol misuse and co-occurring disorders is often difficult to untangle. Let’s take a closer look at why.
Determining which came first — AUD or other co-occurring disorders — can be a bit of a chicken-and-egg problem. Here’s why, according to NIAAA:
Now that we see why AUD and co-occurring disorders can cause extra trouble together, let’s take a look at the brain changes that come with them. Understanding the neuroscience behind dual diagnosis is the first step in finding the right course of treatment!
AUD and other mental health issues affect our brain chemistry, often exacerbating each other. Here’s how alcohol affects the brain and how other conditions play into these effects:
For more information about co-occurring disorders, check out “Where To Find Help for Mental Health Issues Related to Alcohol Use” as well as “The Positive Impacts of Sobriety on Mental Health: Reduced Anxiety, Depression, and Improved Emotional Well-Being.” For now, let’s turn our attention to why 12-step programs may not be the answer to dual-diagnosis treatment and which alternatives offer a science-based approach.
Those of us who struggle with alcohol may be pointed towards Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) at some point in our journey. After all, this peer-led support program has been around for almost a century! While it has benefits, it’s not for everyone — particularly for those with a dual diagnosis. Here’s why:
While AA does have benefits, when it comes to addressing co-occurring disorders, it’s lacking. That’s where science comes in!
So if AA isn’t the solution to co-occurring disorders, what is? Let’s look at some science-based strategies that can help.
Sometimes a neurochemical imbalance calls for a medical solution. These days, psychiatric medications have improved and can be tailored to our individual needs. And while the decision to go this route is always a personal one, it’s something to consider, especially if our condition is known to benefit from medication-assisted treatment (MAT). For example, antipsychotic medications are often used to treat schizophrenia, while mood stabilizers, antipsychotics, and antidepressants can help even out the highs and lows of bipolar disorder.
As for AUD, there are options for MAT as well! While some reduce alcohol’s psychoactive effects, others act as deterrents by causing unpleasant reactions when mixed with booze or by targeting the root of the problem by reducing cravings. (To learn more, check out “Which Medications Work Best To Help Me Stop Drinking?”)
Just as medical treatment has improved over the years, therapy has grown by leaps and bounds. It’s no longer all about recalling your dreams or childhood memories (though that can be part of the picture if it helps). Here’s an overview of various forms of therapy and how they can work wonders for AUD and co-occurring disorders:
As we can see, the world of therapy has expanded since the days of Freud and his famous couch. It’s time to explore what it can do for our dual-diagnosis treatment journey!
While the dual diagnosis road can be a challenging one, rest assured there’s light at the end of the tunnel! With science at our side, we’re more capable than ever of addressing the complex needs that come with co-occurring disorders.
In the end, many of us find that tackling multiple mental health challenges leaves us better equipped to tackle future obstacles in our path. Seeing the broader context of co-occurring disorders and the neuroscience behind mental health issues calls for a more comprehensive toolbox that we can use for anything the future might throw at us.
Wondering how to manage stress in recovery while maintaining sobriety? Our latest blog has you covered! Read about alcohol’s role in stress and learn tips to keep stress at bay.
Although it isn’t a treatment for alcohol use disorder (AUD), the Reframe app can help you cut back on drinking gradually, with the science-backed knowledge to empower you 100% of the way. Our proven program has helped millions of people around the world drink less and live more. And we want to help you get there, too!
The Reframe app equips you with the knowledge and skills you need to not only survive drinking less, but to thrive while you navigate the journey. Our daily research-backed readings teach you the neuroscience of alcohol, and our in-app Toolkit provides the resources and activities you need to navigate each challenge.
You’ll meet hundreds of fellow Reframers in our 24/7 Forum chat and daily Zoom check-in meetings. Receive encouragement from people worldwide who know exactly what you’re going through! You’ll also have the opportunity to connect with our licensed Reframe coaches for more personalized guidance.
Plus, we’re always introducing new features to optimize your in-app experience. We recently launched our in-app chatbot, Melody, powered by the world’s most powerful AI technology. Melody is here to help as you adjust to a life with less (or no) alcohol.
And that’s not all! Every month, we launch fun challenges, like Dry/Damp January, Mental Health May, and Outdoorsy June. You won’t want to miss out on the chance to participate alongside fellow Reframers (or solo if that’s more your thing!).
The Reframe app is free for 7 days, so you don’t have anything to lose by trying it. Are you ready to feel empowered and discover life beyond alcohol? Then download our app through the App Store or Google Play today!
You’ve done the hard part: the wine rack on your kitchen counter is gone, the freezer is stocked with frozen strawberries (not vodka), and your recycling bin is full of seltzer cans (not the “hard” kind). Your sleep is better than ever, your Apple watch says your resting heart rate dropped another 10 bpm, and that outfit you bought in a smaller size to fire up some weight loss motivation finally fits.
Friends are asking — what your secret is, and it’s simple — you stopped drinking. But then life happened. Tax season came around, your air conditioner broke in the middle of summer, and your upstairs neighbor got a drum set. In short, even though you got sober, things got stressful again. Stress management in recovery is key, so let’s explore the ins and outs of maintaining sobriety no matter what life throws at you. We’ve got you!
Sometimes it seems as if the stress response evolved just to spite us. But there’s a biological reason behind it! Back in the day of our earliest ancestors, danger was lurking around just about every corner, with saber-toothed cats, giant hyenas, and other carnivores roaming the land looking for their next meal. At the same time, disputes couldn’t be settled in court or in an email chain, so hand-to-hand combat was often the only way to go.
Stress is our biological first-response system for dealing with danger. As the name suggests, the “fight-or-flight” response is all about facing an attack head-on or making a quick getaway. Here’s what happens when we go into “emergency mode”:
In the presence of true danger, the fight or flight response saves the day. However, for most modern-day problems, it’s overkill: we’re unlikely to be chased by a bison on our morning commute or find a swarm of killer bees in our backyard (though stranger things have happened). Still, we’re wired to respond to milder nuisances — anything from missing our bus to reading a Facebook post that rubs us the wrong way — with the same “all systems go” approach that gets our fight-or-flight response going.
Over time, stress wreaks havoc on our body and mind, leading to inflammation, poor sleep, heart disease, stomach ulcers, psychiatric problems, and a host of other issues. And yes, it can mess with our sobriety.
When it comes to maintaining sobriety while managing stress in recovery, it’s crucial to understand how alcohol contributes to stress in the first place — both while we’re drinking and in the weeks or months afterwards. Here’s the condensed version: alcohol doesn’t relieve stress, it actually causes it.
First, let’s explore why alcohol isn’t (and never was) the solution to stress. Then, we’ll look at healthier ways of managing stress in recovery.
Why do we drink when we’re stressed in the first place? It’s all about brain chemistry:
The problem is, both of these effects are temporary. Within a few hours they wear off, leaving us with rebound anxiety and depression. Plus, chances are, whatever was stressing us out in the first place is still there (bummer!).
In the long run, alcohol is bound to make our stress worse. Here’s why:
Even if we started drinking to deal with external stressors, chances are that over time, alcohol use itself became the main source of our stress. Each time we drank, alcohol provided an illusion of relief. And yet, when the effects wore off, we were left with the original problem we tried to drown in that bottle and an ever-increasing drinking problem to boot. Our problems — and stress — only multiplied.
In other words, at a certain point alcohol started providing a temporary “solution” for the problem that it’s been creating (or at the very least contributing to). How devious!
That said, simply putting down the drink doesn’t make the shadow of booze-related stress disappear. Our physical cravings may be gone, but it takes some time for the neurotransmitter balance to return to normal — we’re not playing with a full neurochemical deck quite yet.
Add to that a stressful external event, and we might find ourselves questioning our resolve to quit drinking. Thanks to a neurological quirk known as “euphoric recall,” we’re more likely to romanticize alcohol as the magic potion that made us feel better, minimizing the negative effects. As a result, that drink might start seeming more and more appealing, upping our risk of relapse.
However, we’ve been there and done that, and it hasn’t worked. It’s time to look for more sustainable ways to deal with stress in recovery and thrive as we continue our journey!
So if booze doesn’t help us de-stress, what does? Let’s find out!
“Life is a dance. Mindfulness is witnessing that dance.” ― Amit Ray
As far as stress-busting is concerned, mindfulness is as close to a superpower as we can get. It’s all about being in the present moment and observing it without judgment.
Tip: Tibetan Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön has a lovely mindfulness trick up her sleeve. Simply picture the source of stress in your mind and address it with the words “How delightful!” (Feel free to do it silently if you’re in a board meeting or on the train to work.) The charming absurdity is often enough to take the tension down a notch (and maybe bring on a chuckle).
Also, check out Reframe’s meditation meetings and mindfulness resources!
“One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.” ― Virginia Woolf
Good nutrition is key — both for recovering after alcohol misuse and making it through stressful times. Here’s how we can use our diet to boost our resilience as we continue to heal:
Tip: A healthy diet isn’t complete without adequate hydration. Carry a water bottle with you and set a reminder on your watch or phone to stay on track.
“Generally speaking, adaptogens help you feel less stressed while increasing energy levels; some are zippy, while others are more balancing or calming.” ― Maria Noel Groves
Adaptogens have been around for centuries but have gone under the radar in modern times. A few years ago, only a hard-core wellness enthusiast could reel off the benefits of rhodiola, tulsi, ashwagandha, or holy basil (to name a few). But times are changing!
These days there’s a lot of talk about adaptogenic herbs — natural substances that help us adapt to stress by modulating the release of stress hormones and building up our resilience. And the stress-busting effects are backed by science! Here’s how UAB scientist Anna Abel explains it:
“Think about your body’s stress response as a bell curve — it goes along, peaks and then drops. That whole response is really taxing to the body. Adaptogens help flatten that curve; it is a more mellowed upward movement and therefore no crash.”
Tip: Health food stores have plenty of adaptogen-based teas, supplements, or extracts. And check out Reframe’s own line of beverages! Again, just remember to get a go-ahead from your doctor first, especially if you have specific health needs.
“I think of the cold as a noble force.” — Wim Hof
Now, this one isn’t for the faint of heart, but stick with us. Science says that cold exposure stimulates the vagus nerve and increases the production of endorphins and norepinephrine, chemicals that help regulate mood and reduce stress while keeping cravings at bay. The vagus nerve is part of the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for calming the body, among other things.
Plus, there’s a host of other benefits that come with cold exposure therapy. It’s known to boost our immune system, improving our body's defense against illnesses. It also enhances circulation and metabolism, helping us feel more energized and burn calories more efficiently.
Tip: Start small. Try turning your shower to a cold temperature for a few seconds at the end of your morning routine, then gradually increase the time. Or, try dipping your face into a bowl of ice water and watch the stress melt away in seconds!
“Deep breathing changes the chemistry of the body by bringing oxygen into the tissue.” — Wim Hof
Want a gentler way to stimulate the vagus nerve? No problem! Breathing exercises such as “polyvagal exercises” will do the trick as well. Polyvagal exercises involve long exhalations that stimulate the vagus nerve. Plus, in addition to diaphragmatic breathing, science shows that activities such as humming, singing, or yoga help activate the parasympathetic nervous system, reducing stress. (And if you’d rather hum than stand in a cold shower, we’re with you!)
Tip: Check out some simple but effective diaphragmatic breathing practices, alternate nostril breathing, and other breathing techniques to bust stress and cravings in one blow!
“Nature is not a place to visit. It is home.” ― Gary Snyder
One of the best stress busters out there is right outside your window! Science says that spending time in nature reduces cortisol levels, lowers blood pressure, and improves mood. In fact, a simple 20-minute walk outside will do the trick! There’s even a type of therapy known as “ecotherapy” that’s all about tapping into the magic of the outdoors.
Tip: Make it a habit to spend some time in nature every day. A city park, tree-lined alley, and even the courtyard of your apartment building will do! Better yet, combine nature time with exercise to double the benefits!
“I don't bother with gyms, I just workout where I happen to be whether it’s in the garden or at home.” — Wim Hof
Back in the 5th century BCE, ancient physician Hippocrates touted the virtues of exercise, pointing out that “all parts of the body, if used in moderation and exercised in labors to which each is accustomed” stay healthy. Left idle, on the other hand, they “become liable to disease, defective in growth and age quickly.”
And modern science agrees! Here are some of the science-backed benefits of exercise:
Tip: Not a fan of going to the gym? No worries! Any type of movement — walking in the park (a double win since you’re also tapping into the power of nature), playing with a hula hoop in the backyard, or getting your sweat on with a kickboxing routine on YouTube will do the trick.
“Feelings are just your body talking to you about how you’re doing in the moment … Tune in to your breathing, and then your body, and then your emotions. It’s a little thing that pays off big.” ― Allyson Dinneen
Ever hear people say “Listen to your body”? While it sounds like useful advice, sometimes it’s easier said than done.
There’s no need to stress, however, because we have a translator! Biofeedback is a type of therapy involving sensors that measure shifts in our heart rate, temperature, muscle contraction, and other physiological changes associated with stress, which appear in real time on a screen. We’re hearing our body’s message loud and clear, seeing subtle signs of stress that we might have otherwise missed.
Neurofeedback, in turn, measures real-time changes in brain wave patterns in response to stress through electrodes placed on the scalp (don’t worry, it’s not invasive — though one drawback is that it calls for hi-tech equipment and a trip to a specialist’s office). We can then use breathing techniques or other relaxation methods (more on that below) to wipe out stress at the root, before it gets more overwhelming. And before you dismiss it as sounding too hokey, rest assured — there’s a fair amount of science behind biofeedback and neurofeedback.
Tip: For a more user-friendly take on biofeedback, check out handheld heart rate variability (HRV) monitors that guide you through breathing exercises and give immediate feedback on your stress levels.
“Facebook has been spreading across the continents faster than a highly contagious Asian bird flu!” ― Gemini Adams
Ever notice how taking a “break” by scrolling through Facebook can sometimes make us feel more stressed afterwards? Maybe it’s seeing people lounging on the beach while we’re stuck indoors scrubbing the fridge. Or maybe it’s a comment that rubs us the wrong way. Either way, our online lives can add to our stress.
Taking regular breaks from social media and being mindful about the sites we visit is crucial for keeping stress at bay. And since the online world is full of alcohol triggers — maybe those people on the beach are halfway through a six-pack — it’s also key for maintaining sobriety.
Tip: Designate a device-free hour during the day and spend it practicing mindfulness, journaling, or catching up with friends. If a whole hour is too much, break it up into 15-minute chunks throughout the day.
“Life is not a solo act. It's a huge collaboration, and we all need to assemble around us the people who care about us and support us in times of strife.” — Tim Gunn
Last but not least, stressful times are infinitely easier to get through with a solid team behind us. Positive social interactions boost oxytocin levels, helping us become more resilient and reducing stress. So don’t hesitate to ask for help!
Tip: Build a support network and reach out to at least one person every day. And remember, online communities such as Reframe are a wonderful source of social support!
All in all, managing stress in recovery and maintaining sobriety is all about building a rewarding and sustainable life. Instead of looking at quitting booze as a “sacrifice,” we can see it as an opportunity for change.
As journalist Germany Kent puts it, “It’s a funny thing about life, once you begin to take note of the things you are grateful for, you begin to lose sight of the things that you lack.” We can be grateful for the opportunity to become better versions of ourselves through the alcohol journey. Challenging as it may be — especially during stressful times — the struggles are bound to be worth it in the end, giving us a physical and emotional “upgrade” we never dreamt of.
You’ve done the hard part: the wine rack on your kitchen counter is gone, the freezer is stocked with frozen strawberries (not vodka), and your recycling bin is full of seltzer cans (not the “hard” kind). Your sleep is better than ever, your Apple watch says your resting heart rate dropped another 10 bpm, and that outfit you bought in a smaller size to fire up some weight loss motivation finally fits.
Friends are asking — what your secret is, and it’s simple — you stopped drinking. But then life happened. Tax season came around, your air conditioner broke in the middle of summer, and your upstairs neighbor got a drum set. In short, even though you got sober, things got stressful again. Stress management in recovery is key, so let’s explore the ins and outs of maintaining sobriety no matter what life throws at you. We’ve got you!
Sometimes it seems as if the stress response evolved just to spite us. But there’s a biological reason behind it! Back in the day of our earliest ancestors, danger was lurking around just about every corner, with saber-toothed cats, giant hyenas, and other carnivores roaming the land looking for their next meal. At the same time, disputes couldn’t be settled in court or in an email chain, so hand-to-hand combat was often the only way to go.
Stress is our biological first-response system for dealing with danger. As the name suggests, the “fight-or-flight” response is all about facing an attack head-on or making a quick getaway. Here’s what happens when we go into “emergency mode”:
In the presence of true danger, the fight or flight response saves the day. However, for most modern-day problems, it’s overkill: we’re unlikely to be chased by a bison on our morning commute or find a swarm of killer bees in our backyard (though stranger things have happened). Still, we’re wired to respond to milder nuisances — anything from missing our bus to reading a Facebook post that rubs us the wrong way — with the same “all systems go” approach that gets our fight-or-flight response going.
Over time, stress wreaks havoc on our body and mind, leading to inflammation, poor sleep, heart disease, stomach ulcers, psychiatric problems, and a host of other issues. And yes, it can mess with our sobriety.
When it comes to maintaining sobriety while managing stress in recovery, it’s crucial to understand how alcohol contributes to stress in the first place — both while we’re drinking and in the weeks or months afterwards. Here’s the condensed version: alcohol doesn’t relieve stress, it actually causes it.
First, let’s explore why alcohol isn’t (and never was) the solution to stress. Then, we’ll look at healthier ways of managing stress in recovery.
Why do we drink when we’re stressed in the first place? It’s all about brain chemistry:
The problem is, both of these effects are temporary. Within a few hours they wear off, leaving us with rebound anxiety and depression. Plus, chances are, whatever was stressing us out in the first place is still there (bummer!).
In the long run, alcohol is bound to make our stress worse. Here’s why:
Even if we started drinking to deal with external stressors, chances are that over time, alcohol use itself became the main source of our stress. Each time we drank, alcohol provided an illusion of relief. And yet, when the effects wore off, we were left with the original problem we tried to drown in that bottle and an ever-increasing drinking problem to boot. Our problems — and stress — only multiplied.
In other words, at a certain point alcohol started providing a temporary “solution” for the problem that it’s been creating (or at the very least contributing to). How devious!
That said, simply putting down the drink doesn’t make the shadow of booze-related stress disappear. Our physical cravings may be gone, but it takes some time for the neurotransmitter balance to return to normal — we’re not playing with a full neurochemical deck quite yet.
Add to that a stressful external event, and we might find ourselves questioning our resolve to quit drinking. Thanks to a neurological quirk known as “euphoric recall,” we’re more likely to romanticize alcohol as the magic potion that made us feel better, minimizing the negative effects. As a result, that drink might start seeming more and more appealing, upping our risk of relapse.
However, we’ve been there and done that, and it hasn’t worked. It’s time to look for more sustainable ways to deal with stress in recovery and thrive as we continue our journey!
So if booze doesn’t help us de-stress, what does? Let’s find out!
“Life is a dance. Mindfulness is witnessing that dance.” ― Amit Ray
As far as stress-busting is concerned, mindfulness is as close to a superpower as we can get. It’s all about being in the present moment and observing it without judgment.
Tip: Tibetan Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön has a lovely mindfulness trick up her sleeve. Simply picture the source of stress in your mind and address it with the words “How delightful!” (Feel free to do it silently if you’re in a board meeting or on the train to work.) The charming absurdity is often enough to take the tension down a notch (and maybe bring on a chuckle).
Also, check out Reframe’s meditation meetings and mindfulness resources!
“One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.” ― Virginia Woolf
Good nutrition is key — both for recovering after alcohol misuse and making it through stressful times. Here’s how we can use our diet to boost our resilience as we continue to heal:
Tip: A healthy diet isn’t complete without adequate hydration. Carry a water bottle with you and set a reminder on your watch or phone to stay on track.
“Generally speaking, adaptogens help you feel less stressed while increasing energy levels; some are zippy, while others are more balancing or calming.” ― Maria Noel Groves
Adaptogens have been around for centuries but have gone under the radar in modern times. A few years ago, only a hard-core wellness enthusiast could reel off the benefits of rhodiola, tulsi, ashwagandha, or holy basil (to name a few). But times are changing!
These days there’s a lot of talk about adaptogenic herbs — natural substances that help us adapt to stress by modulating the release of stress hormones and building up our resilience. And the stress-busting effects are backed by science! Here’s how UAB scientist Anna Abel explains it:
“Think about your body’s stress response as a bell curve — it goes along, peaks and then drops. That whole response is really taxing to the body. Adaptogens help flatten that curve; it is a more mellowed upward movement and therefore no crash.”
Tip: Health food stores have plenty of adaptogen-based teas, supplements, or extracts. And check out Reframe’s own line of beverages! Again, just remember to get a go-ahead from your doctor first, especially if you have specific health needs.
“I think of the cold as a noble force.” — Wim Hof
Now, this one isn’t for the faint of heart, but stick with us. Science says that cold exposure stimulates the vagus nerve and increases the production of endorphins and norepinephrine, chemicals that help regulate mood and reduce stress while keeping cravings at bay. The vagus nerve is part of the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for calming the body, among other things.
Plus, there’s a host of other benefits that come with cold exposure therapy. It’s known to boost our immune system, improving our body's defense against illnesses. It also enhances circulation and metabolism, helping us feel more energized and burn calories more efficiently.
Tip: Start small. Try turning your shower to a cold temperature for a few seconds at the end of your morning routine, then gradually increase the time. Or, try dipping your face into a bowl of ice water and watch the stress melt away in seconds!
“Deep breathing changes the chemistry of the body by bringing oxygen into the tissue.” — Wim Hof
Want a gentler way to stimulate the vagus nerve? No problem! Breathing exercises such as “polyvagal exercises” will do the trick as well. Polyvagal exercises involve long exhalations that stimulate the vagus nerve. Plus, in addition to diaphragmatic breathing, science shows that activities such as humming, singing, or yoga help activate the parasympathetic nervous system, reducing stress. (And if you’d rather hum than stand in a cold shower, we’re with you!)
Tip: Check out some simple but effective diaphragmatic breathing practices, alternate nostril breathing, and other breathing techniques to bust stress and cravings in one blow!
“Nature is not a place to visit. It is home.” ― Gary Snyder
One of the best stress busters out there is right outside your window! Science says that spending time in nature reduces cortisol levels, lowers blood pressure, and improves mood. In fact, a simple 20-minute walk outside will do the trick! There’s even a type of therapy known as “ecotherapy” that’s all about tapping into the magic of the outdoors.
Tip: Make it a habit to spend some time in nature every day. A city park, tree-lined alley, and even the courtyard of your apartment building will do! Better yet, combine nature time with exercise to double the benefits!
“I don't bother with gyms, I just workout where I happen to be whether it’s in the garden or at home.” — Wim Hof
Back in the 5th century BCE, ancient physician Hippocrates touted the virtues of exercise, pointing out that “all parts of the body, if used in moderation and exercised in labors to which each is accustomed” stay healthy. Left idle, on the other hand, they “become liable to disease, defective in growth and age quickly.”
And modern science agrees! Here are some of the science-backed benefits of exercise:
Tip: Not a fan of going to the gym? No worries! Any type of movement — walking in the park (a double win since you’re also tapping into the power of nature), playing with a hula hoop in the backyard, or getting your sweat on with a kickboxing routine on YouTube will do the trick.
“Feelings are just your body talking to you about how you’re doing in the moment … Tune in to your breathing, and then your body, and then your emotions. It’s a little thing that pays off big.” ― Allyson Dinneen
Ever hear people say “Listen to your body”? While it sounds like useful advice, sometimes it’s easier said than done.
There’s no need to stress, however, because we have a translator! Biofeedback is a type of therapy involving sensors that measure shifts in our heart rate, temperature, muscle contraction, and other physiological changes associated with stress, which appear in real time on a screen. We’re hearing our body’s message loud and clear, seeing subtle signs of stress that we might have otherwise missed.
Neurofeedback, in turn, measures real-time changes in brain wave patterns in response to stress through electrodes placed on the scalp (don’t worry, it’s not invasive — though one drawback is that it calls for hi-tech equipment and a trip to a specialist’s office). We can then use breathing techniques or other relaxation methods (more on that below) to wipe out stress at the root, before it gets more overwhelming. And before you dismiss it as sounding too hokey, rest assured — there’s a fair amount of science behind biofeedback and neurofeedback.
Tip: For a more user-friendly take on biofeedback, check out handheld heart rate variability (HRV) monitors that guide you through breathing exercises and give immediate feedback on your stress levels.
“Facebook has been spreading across the continents faster than a highly contagious Asian bird flu!” ― Gemini Adams
Ever notice how taking a “break” by scrolling through Facebook can sometimes make us feel more stressed afterwards? Maybe it’s seeing people lounging on the beach while we’re stuck indoors scrubbing the fridge. Or maybe it’s a comment that rubs us the wrong way. Either way, our online lives can add to our stress.
Taking regular breaks from social media and being mindful about the sites we visit is crucial for keeping stress at bay. And since the online world is full of alcohol triggers — maybe those people on the beach are halfway through a six-pack — it’s also key for maintaining sobriety.
Tip: Designate a device-free hour during the day and spend it practicing mindfulness, journaling, or catching up with friends. If a whole hour is too much, break it up into 15-minute chunks throughout the day.
“Life is not a solo act. It's a huge collaboration, and we all need to assemble around us the people who care about us and support us in times of strife.” — Tim Gunn
Last but not least, stressful times are infinitely easier to get through with a solid team behind us. Positive social interactions boost oxytocin levels, helping us become more resilient and reducing stress. So don’t hesitate to ask for help!
Tip: Build a support network and reach out to at least one person every day. And remember, online communities such as Reframe are a wonderful source of social support!
All in all, managing stress in recovery and maintaining sobriety is all about building a rewarding and sustainable life. Instead of looking at quitting booze as a “sacrifice,” we can see it as an opportunity for change.
As journalist Germany Kent puts it, “It’s a funny thing about life, once you begin to take note of the things you are grateful for, you begin to lose sight of the things that you lack.” We can be grateful for the opportunity to become better versions of ourselves through the alcohol journey. Challenging as it may be — especially during stressful times — the struggles are bound to be worth it in the end, giving us a physical and emotional “upgrade” we never dreamt of.
Interested in learning how to repair dopamine receptors? Dopamine detox could help! Learn more about this and where alcohol fits into the picture in our latest blog.
Although it isn’t a treatment for alcohol use disorder (AUD), the Reframe app can help you cut back on drinking gradually, with the science-backed knowledge to empower you 100% of the way. Our proven program has helped millions of people around the world drink less and live more. And we want to help you get there, too!
The Reframe app equips you with the knowledge and skills you need to not only survive drinking less, but to thrive while you navigate the journey. Our daily research-backed readings teach you the neuroscience of alcohol, and our in-app Toolkit provides the resources and activities you need to navigate each challenge.
You’ll meet hundreds of fellow Reframers in our 24/7 Forum chat and daily Zoom check-in meetings. Receive encouragement from people worldwide who know exactly what you’re going through! You’ll also have the opportunity to connect with our licensed Reframe coaches for more personalized guidance.
Plus, we’re always introducing new features to optimize your in-app experience. We recently launched our in-app chatbot, Melody, powered by the world’s most powerful AI technology. Melody is here to help as you adjust to a life with less (or no) alcohol.
And that’s not all! Every month, we launch fun challenges, like Dry/Damp January, Mental Health May, and Outdoorsy June. You won’t want to miss out on the chance to participate alongside fellow Reframers (or solo if that’s more your thing!).
The Reframe app is free for 7 days, so you don’t have anything to lose by trying it. Are you ready to feel empowered and discover life beyond alcohol? Then download our app through the App Store or Google Play today!
Have you ever had a long week and to de-stress you decide to binge-watch your favorite show, scroll through social media to stay up-to-date on the latest trends, and chow down on your favorite takeout? It felt like the perfect way to unwind, yet the next day, you’re left feeling strangely restless and empty. This cycle of fleeting pleasure followed by dissatisfaction is all too common in our dopamine-driven world.
Enter the concept of a dopamine detox — a practice that promises to hit the reset button on our brain’s reward system. But what about that cold can of beer or glass of wine that often accompanies these moments of leisure? Alcohol, a powerful player in the dopamine game, significantly influences our mental balance. Let’s explore the transformative benefits of a dopamine detox and why rethinking our relationship with alcohol can be a crucial step toward a more fulfilling life.
Dopamine is a neurotransmitter — a chemical messenger in our brain. Known as one of the “feel-good” hormones in the brain’s reward system, it plays a major role in pleasure, motivation, and learning. Dopamine sends signals to our brain that something is pleasurable, and our brain then learns that we want more of whatever it may be that makes us feel good.
Anything from naturally fulfilling moments such as seeing our loved ones to drugs that artificially promote dopamine release can give us a sense of pleasure. Take your morning cup of coffee, for example. If it’s something we enjoy or even if it’s just the energy boost we’re chasing, coffee releases dopamine, which signals to our brain that coffee is linked to pleasure. And before we know it, that morning cup of coffee can turn into two (or five, or the whole pot!).
Dopamine is an essential hormone that affects our mood and learning. However, in our world today, there are so many things that can give us an artificial dopamine boost and oversaturate our brain that we continue to chase these highs. Data reports show that the average time people spend on social media per day skyrocketed from 90 minutes in 2013 to 143 minutes in 2024. And this is just one example. The National Center for Drug Abuse Statistics reports that 13.5% of Americans 12 and over used drugs in the last month, which is a 3.8% increase year-over-year. With the growing availability of activities and substances that provide instant gratification, the idea of a dopamine detox formed. Let’s learn more.
A dopamine detox is a practice developed by California psychiatrist Cameron Sepah. The practice stems from cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) skills, which help us develop more positive behaviors. During a dopamine detox, we simply refrain from partaking in certain pleasurable stimuli for a period of time.
The idea is that by removing unhealthy stimuli, our desire for an immediate reward decreases, and, as a result, we reduce unwanted compulsive behaviors. By rewiring our response to specific stimuli, a dopamine detox promotes finding pleasure in naturally rewarding activities that allow us to live a more fulfilling life. Sepah proposed the dopamine detox concept to target six main behavioral categories:
He noted, however, that dopamine detox can be used for any behavior that is negatively affecting our life.
The idea has since taken over the internet, but due to confusing or inaccuate information, we could end up using the practice in an incorrect, extreme, or even harmful way (don’t worry, we’ll get into how to do it properly in a bit). A common misconception is that a dopamine detox aims to lower dopamine levels. We may end up searching “how to lower dopamine” but in actuality, dopamine is a naturally occurring chemical in our body and essential for normal functions. Instead, a dopamine detox removes stimuli that constantly release dopamine and thus promote unhealthy behaviors. With a proper detox, we can develop healthier habits overall. Let’s better understand how it helps us live a more fulfilling life.
When done correctly, a dopamine detox...
There are many benefits of doing a dopamine detox, but it can also be harmful when not done effectively. So, what’s the right way to do a dopamine detox?
Another way to think of a dopamine detox is as a reset. By removing certain stimuli, our brain isn’t oversaturated with substances and activities that give us temporary feelings of pleasure. Without the extra dopamine, we can return to a level closer to baseline.
The first step in doing a dopamine detox or reset is increasing our awareness of what negative behaviors we want to change, and the triggers and emotions surrounding them. Then, we can remove the unwanted stimuli. Cameron Sepah notes that “how to dopamine detox effectively” involves starting with something that is minimally disruptive to our current lifestyle.
For example, start with a couple of hours a day or one day out of the weekend. Take a break from scrolling endlessly on social media, mindlessly finishing a bag of chips, or pouring a couple of glasses of wine to feel more relaxed. Instead, we can spend that time reconnecting with ourselves and others. Try more relaxing activities such as meditation, taking a walk, or journaling. While we may feel bored or restless at first, we’ll slowly start to enjoy more natural ways to boost our mood, making us less interested in the allure of high dopamine-triggering substances and activities, such as alcohol. Speaking of alcohol, let’s take a closer look at the connection between alcohol and dopamine.
Alcohol temporarily increases dopamine release, which explains the feelings of euphoria and pleasure that are often associated with drinking. After we drink, our dopamine levels drop down, leading to the depressant effects of alcohol such as low mood, lethargy, and lack of motivation (welcome to the hangover). Since our brain naturally seeks things that are pleasurable, we may get cravings to drink and continue to drink despite the adverse effects we feel.
Not only does alcohol cause our dopamine levels to fluctuate, but over time, our brain adapts to the high levels of dopamine that drinking can cause, and, as a result, we naturally produce less dopamine. This means that we’ll need to drink more and more alcohol to reach the same dopamine hit or level of pleasure we’re seeking. Excessive drinking decreases the natural production of dopamine, but how does it affect dopamine receptors?
Dopamine receptors are sites that bind with dopamine. Dopamine then initiates the signaling responsible for activating certain areas of the brain responsible for pleasure. Think of dopamine as a plug and dopamine receptors as the socket. When the two connect, that’s when we get power, or in this case, when our brain receives the signal that something is pleasurable.
Alcohol doesn’t kill dopamine receptors, but it does impact the expression of certain receptors, which has essentiallythe same effect. There are five types of dopamine receptors — D1–D5 — which have different functions and are found in different areas of the brain. Research shows that reductions in D2 receptors have been reported in those with alcohol use disorder. Similarly, a study using rats that underwent chronic intermittent ethanol exposure found disruptions specifically in D2 and D4 receptors. D2 and D4 receptors are associated with attention, sleep memory, locomotion, and impulse control.
So, alcohol not only decreases the production of dopamine, but it also affects our ability to sense pleasure from other activities since our dopamine receptors aren’t working properly. To learn more, check out “Relationship Between Anhedonic Depression and Alcohol.”
Now that we know how alcohol impacts our dopamine receptors, we might be wondering how to repair receptors to hopefully reverse the disruption. Searching for solutions on the internet can have us running in circles, but don’t panic! The answer is fairly simple. By avoiding alcohol, which is the substance responsible for throwing dopamine and its receptors out of whack, our body naturally restores its own balance of neurotransmitters and receptors! We’ll give our brain even more love and fuel to rebalance itself if we engaging in natural dopamine-boosting activities like these:
There are certainly more activities out there that naturally boost dopamine, but these are a good place to start!
As we’ve learned, alcohol directly affects dopamine. So, choosing to do a dopamine detox without also eliminating alcohol defeats the purpose. In fact, thiis can make our drinking habits even more serious due to transfer addictions.
Transfer addiction involves replacing one compulsive behavior or addiction with another. Let’s say we struggle with excessive spending and heavy drinking. We decide to do a dopamine detox and tackle our impulsive shopping habits. Our brain may be looking for that dopamine surge from shopping, but with alcohol still an option, we end up relying on drinking for that dopamine boost — further strengthening the link between alcohol and pleasure.
Avoiding alcohol during a dopamine reset helps us reap the full benefits of the practice. Skipping the drink not only prevents disruption of dopamine levels, but it also supports other neurotransmitters such as serotonin, which is responsible for feelings of happiness.
Dopamine fasting can help prevent alcohol dependence as it's essentially a tool and motivation to avoid alcohol. By pressing pause on alcohol, we can increase our awareness of our drinking habits and triggers. Let’s say we decide to commit to doing an alcohol detox on the weekends. After doing this, we notice that stress, boredom, and maybe socializing with certain friends make us crave alcohol. By identifying triggers for our drinking and developing strategies to avoid or overcome them, we can reduce the risk of alcohol dependence.
While a dopamine detox can be beneficial, its effects don’t last forever. Once we go back to drinking, we may find ourselves back where we started, and later on we may need another dopamine detox. Instead, we can focus on improving a negative relationship with alcohol through mindful drinking. This approach can be more sustainable than doing dopamine detoxes because we are tackling our drinking habits diirectly..
Dopamine detox, also known as an “intentional unwind” (although it doesn’t have the same ring), helps us cultivate a life where joy is no longer tethered to fleeting highs but instead rooted in lasting, meaningful experiences. While a dopamine reset, done right, has many benefits — reducing stress, building more positive behaviors, and developing deeper connections — mindful drinking to help us quit or cut back on alcohol may be more sustainable and beneficial. So, let’s take this step towards limiting dopamine-disrupting substances to live a life of greater clarity and connection!
Have you ever had a long week and to de-stress you decide to binge-watch your favorite show, scroll through social media to stay up-to-date on the latest trends, and chow down on your favorite takeout? It felt like the perfect way to unwind, yet the next day, you’re left feeling strangely restless and empty. This cycle of fleeting pleasure followed by dissatisfaction is all too common in our dopamine-driven world.
Enter the concept of a dopamine detox — a practice that promises to hit the reset button on our brain’s reward system. But what about that cold can of beer or glass of wine that often accompanies these moments of leisure? Alcohol, a powerful player in the dopamine game, significantly influences our mental balance. Let’s explore the transformative benefits of a dopamine detox and why rethinking our relationship with alcohol can be a crucial step toward a more fulfilling life.
Dopamine is a neurotransmitter — a chemical messenger in our brain. Known as one of the “feel-good” hormones in the brain’s reward system, it plays a major role in pleasure, motivation, and learning. Dopamine sends signals to our brain that something is pleasurable, and our brain then learns that we want more of whatever it may be that makes us feel good.
Anything from naturally fulfilling moments such as seeing our loved ones to drugs that artificially promote dopamine release can give us a sense of pleasure. Take your morning cup of coffee, for example. If it’s something we enjoy or even if it’s just the energy boost we’re chasing, coffee releases dopamine, which signals to our brain that coffee is linked to pleasure. And before we know it, that morning cup of coffee can turn into two (or five, or the whole pot!).
Dopamine is an essential hormone that affects our mood and learning. However, in our world today, there are so many things that can give us an artificial dopamine boost and oversaturate our brain that we continue to chase these highs. Data reports show that the average time people spend on social media per day skyrocketed from 90 minutes in 2013 to 143 minutes in 2024. And this is just one example. The National Center for Drug Abuse Statistics reports that 13.5% of Americans 12 and over used drugs in the last month, which is a 3.8% increase year-over-year. With the growing availability of activities and substances that provide instant gratification, the idea of a dopamine detox formed. Let’s learn more.
A dopamine detox is a practice developed by California psychiatrist Cameron Sepah. The practice stems from cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) skills, which help us develop more positive behaviors. During a dopamine detox, we simply refrain from partaking in certain pleasurable stimuli for a period of time.
The idea is that by removing unhealthy stimuli, our desire for an immediate reward decreases, and, as a result, we reduce unwanted compulsive behaviors. By rewiring our response to specific stimuli, a dopamine detox promotes finding pleasure in naturally rewarding activities that allow us to live a more fulfilling life. Sepah proposed the dopamine detox concept to target six main behavioral categories:
He noted, however, that dopamine detox can be used for any behavior that is negatively affecting our life.
The idea has since taken over the internet, but due to confusing or inaccuate information, we could end up using the practice in an incorrect, extreme, or even harmful way (don’t worry, we’ll get into how to do it properly in a bit). A common misconception is that a dopamine detox aims to lower dopamine levels. We may end up searching “how to lower dopamine” but in actuality, dopamine is a naturally occurring chemical in our body and essential for normal functions. Instead, a dopamine detox removes stimuli that constantly release dopamine and thus promote unhealthy behaviors. With a proper detox, we can develop healthier habits overall. Let’s better understand how it helps us live a more fulfilling life.
When done correctly, a dopamine detox...
There are many benefits of doing a dopamine detox, but it can also be harmful when not done effectively. So, what’s the right way to do a dopamine detox?
Another way to think of a dopamine detox is as a reset. By removing certain stimuli, our brain isn’t oversaturated with substances and activities that give us temporary feelings of pleasure. Without the extra dopamine, we can return to a level closer to baseline.
The first step in doing a dopamine detox or reset is increasing our awareness of what negative behaviors we want to change, and the triggers and emotions surrounding them. Then, we can remove the unwanted stimuli. Cameron Sepah notes that “how to dopamine detox effectively” involves starting with something that is minimally disruptive to our current lifestyle.
For example, start with a couple of hours a day or one day out of the weekend. Take a break from scrolling endlessly on social media, mindlessly finishing a bag of chips, or pouring a couple of glasses of wine to feel more relaxed. Instead, we can spend that time reconnecting with ourselves and others. Try more relaxing activities such as meditation, taking a walk, or journaling. While we may feel bored or restless at first, we’ll slowly start to enjoy more natural ways to boost our mood, making us less interested in the allure of high dopamine-triggering substances and activities, such as alcohol. Speaking of alcohol, let’s take a closer look at the connection between alcohol and dopamine.
Alcohol temporarily increases dopamine release, which explains the feelings of euphoria and pleasure that are often associated with drinking. After we drink, our dopamine levels drop down, leading to the depressant effects of alcohol such as low mood, lethargy, and lack of motivation (welcome to the hangover). Since our brain naturally seeks things that are pleasurable, we may get cravings to drink and continue to drink despite the adverse effects we feel.
Not only does alcohol cause our dopamine levels to fluctuate, but over time, our brain adapts to the high levels of dopamine that drinking can cause, and, as a result, we naturally produce less dopamine. This means that we’ll need to drink more and more alcohol to reach the same dopamine hit or level of pleasure we’re seeking. Excessive drinking decreases the natural production of dopamine, but how does it affect dopamine receptors?
Dopamine receptors are sites that bind with dopamine. Dopamine then initiates the signaling responsible for activating certain areas of the brain responsible for pleasure. Think of dopamine as a plug and dopamine receptors as the socket. When the two connect, that’s when we get power, or in this case, when our brain receives the signal that something is pleasurable.
Alcohol doesn’t kill dopamine receptors, but it does impact the expression of certain receptors, which has essentiallythe same effect. There are five types of dopamine receptors — D1–D5 — which have different functions and are found in different areas of the brain. Research shows that reductions in D2 receptors have been reported in those with alcohol use disorder. Similarly, a study using rats that underwent chronic intermittent ethanol exposure found disruptions specifically in D2 and D4 receptors. D2 and D4 receptors are associated with attention, sleep memory, locomotion, and impulse control.
So, alcohol not only decreases the production of dopamine, but it also affects our ability to sense pleasure from other activities since our dopamine receptors aren’t working properly. To learn more, check out “Relationship Between Anhedonic Depression and Alcohol.”
Now that we know how alcohol impacts our dopamine receptors, we might be wondering how to repair receptors to hopefully reverse the disruption. Searching for solutions on the internet can have us running in circles, but don’t panic! The answer is fairly simple. By avoiding alcohol, which is the substance responsible for throwing dopamine and its receptors out of whack, our body naturally restores its own balance of neurotransmitters and receptors! We’ll give our brain even more love and fuel to rebalance itself if we engaging in natural dopamine-boosting activities like these:
There are certainly more activities out there that naturally boost dopamine, but these are a good place to start!
As we’ve learned, alcohol directly affects dopamine. So, choosing to do a dopamine detox without also eliminating alcohol defeats the purpose. In fact, thiis can make our drinking habits even more serious due to transfer addictions.
Transfer addiction involves replacing one compulsive behavior or addiction with another. Let’s say we struggle with excessive spending and heavy drinking. We decide to do a dopamine detox and tackle our impulsive shopping habits. Our brain may be looking for that dopamine surge from shopping, but with alcohol still an option, we end up relying on drinking for that dopamine boost — further strengthening the link between alcohol and pleasure.
Avoiding alcohol during a dopamine reset helps us reap the full benefits of the practice. Skipping the drink not only prevents disruption of dopamine levels, but it also supports other neurotransmitters such as serotonin, which is responsible for feelings of happiness.
Dopamine fasting can help prevent alcohol dependence as it's essentially a tool and motivation to avoid alcohol. By pressing pause on alcohol, we can increase our awareness of our drinking habits and triggers. Let’s say we decide to commit to doing an alcohol detox on the weekends. After doing this, we notice that stress, boredom, and maybe socializing with certain friends make us crave alcohol. By identifying triggers for our drinking and developing strategies to avoid or overcome them, we can reduce the risk of alcohol dependence.
While a dopamine detox can be beneficial, its effects don’t last forever. Once we go back to drinking, we may find ourselves back where we started, and later on we may need another dopamine detox. Instead, we can focus on improving a negative relationship with alcohol through mindful drinking. This approach can be more sustainable than doing dopamine detoxes because we are tackling our drinking habits diirectly..
Dopamine detox, also known as an “intentional unwind” (although it doesn’t have the same ring), helps us cultivate a life where joy is no longer tethered to fleeting highs but instead rooted in lasting, meaningful experiences. While a dopamine reset, done right, has many benefits — reducing stress, building more positive behaviors, and developing deeper connections — mindful drinking to help us quit or cut back on alcohol may be more sustainable and beneficial. So, let’s take this step towards limiting dopamine-disrupting substances to live a life of greater clarity and connection!
Is self harm an addiction? And does alcohol play a role in it? Learn more about the connection, brain chemistry, and self-harm recovery options in our latest blog.
Although it isn’t a treatment for alcohol use disorder (AUD), the Reframe app can help you cut back on drinking gradually, with the science-backed knowledge to empower you 100% of the way. Our proven program has helped millions of people around the world drink less and live more. And we want to help you get there, too!
The Reframe app equips you with the knowledge and skills you need to not only survive drinking less, but to thrive while you navigate the journey. Our daily research-backed readings teach you the neuroscience of alcohol, and our in-app Toolkit provides the resources and activities you need to navigate each challenge.
You’ll meet hundreds of fellow Reframers in our 24/7 Forum chat and daily Zoom check-in meetings. Receive encouragement from people worldwide who know exactly what you’re going through! You’ll also have the opportunity to connect with our licensed Reframe coaches for more personalized guidance.
Plus, we’re always introducing new features to optimize your in-app experience. We recently launched our in-app chatbot, Melody, powered by the world’s most powerful AI technology. Melody is here to help as you adjust to a life with less (or no) alcohol.
And that’s not all! Every month, we launch fun challenges, like Dry/Damp January, Mental Health May, and Outdoorsy June. You won’t want to miss out on the chance to participate alongside fellow Reframers (or solo if that’s more your thing!).
The Reframe app is free for 7 days, so you don’t have anything to lose by trying it. Are you ready to feel empowered and discover life beyond alcohol? Then download our app through the App Store or Google Play today!
In Girl in Pieces, Kathleen Glasgow writes: “I just want to feel better. My own body is my deepest enemy. It wants, it wants, it wants and when it does not get, it cries and cries and I punish it. How can you live in fear of your own body?”
And yet, so many people develop a painful relationship with what should, in theory, be our closest friend and ally — our own body. Self-harm is, unfortunately, very common and affects people across the globe. But what is it exactly? Is self-harm an addiction? And what is its relationship to alcohol?
The psychology behind self-harm can be complicated, but it comes down to this: it’s an attempt to feel emotional relief through inflicting physical pain on ourselves. It might seem counterintuitive to an outside observer, but at its heart, self-harm is usually a way to overcome overwhelming emotional distress.
While self-harm can consist of any infliction of pain or injury, there are some common patterns, according to SAMHSA:
It’s important to note that there’s a big difference between self-harm and suicidal behavior: the intent is not to end one’s life but rather to find some relief from (what seems at the moment like) an insurmountable emotional obstacle.
While self-harm looks different in each individual case, there are some patterns that scientists and medical professionals have noted over the years. Here’s an overview:
People might describe self-harm as “addictive,” but is it really a true “addiction”? The answer is complex. While self-harm isn’t classified as an addiction by doctors, it does share some common features with substance misuse and addictive behaviors. Here’s an overview:
We’ll return to the role of dopamine in self-harm a bit later when we talk about its connection with alcohol use. For now, let’s get a bit more acquainted with the emotional landscape around self-harm and look at the reasons why people might choose to self-harm.
What is it that prompts us to go against the natural instinct to take care of our bodies and shield ourselves from pain? The reality is, any intense emotion — fear, anger, self-doubt, embarrassment, and so forth — can serve as a trigger. Once we discover a quick way to feel relief from whatever troubles us, it’s easy for that behavior to become a “quick-fix solution” to our problems, even when doing so isn’t in our best interests. As Caroline Kettlewell writes in Skin Game:
You might imagine that a person would resort to self-mutilation only under extremes of duress, but once I'd crossed that line the first time, taken that fateful step off the precipice, then almost any reason was a good enough reason, almost any provocation was provocation enough. Cutting was my all-purpose solution.
As far as science is concerned, there are a few common emotional triggers that lead people to self-injure. From an NCBI article “Why do people self-injure?”:
In the end, the reasons behind NSSI will always be deeply personal and might vary. Regardless of what drives the impulse, it’s essential to be kind to ourselves and realize that there’s no shame in asking for help. There are many caring folks out there who have been where you are and know what it’s like. Don’t lose hope!
Finally, there’s the question of self-harm, alcohol, and other forms of substance misuse. Is there a direct link between them? Do they tend to occur together? Research says that they can — for a number of reasons. Let’s take a closer look.
For one thing, the same reasons that drive us to self-harm can trigger alcohol misuse. Self-harm often co-occurs with other addictions, such as substance abuse, gambling, or eating disorders. This overlap might be due to underlying issues such as anxiety, depression, or trauma, which drive both self-harm and other addictive behaviors. The use of multiple coping mechanisms can make them tricky to untangle, but it’s crucial to do so in order to get better. Occasionally, addictions might “take turns” as we turn to one and then switch to another. This phenomenon is known as “transfer addictions” — to find out more, check out “What Are Transfer Addictions? Examining the Science.”
Research shows that people are more likely to self-harm while drinking. In fact, alcohol was a factor in 21% of self-harm cases, according to one study. There are a few reasons why the two often go together:
As we can see, alcohol’s effects on mood make it a particularly dangerous “partner in crime.” We’re more likely to self-harm when drunk. We are also more likely to experience urges to self-harm because of alcohol’s effects on our mental and emotional state.
But there’s more to the story. Let’s take a deeper look at the dopamine-driven reward system that drives our habits.
As you can see, there are overlapping mechanisms involved in self-harm and alcohol misuse, so the two can be self-reinforcing. Alcohol misuse is driven by dopamine — the reward neurotransmitter that plays an essential role in habit formation and learning. The brain loves habits and keeps them alive through dopamine surges that create feelings of pleasure. There’s an evolutionary reason behind this system: the neurological “reward” is meant to keep us alive by encouraging habits that increase our chances of survival, such as eating, socializing, and finding romantic partners.
Unfortunately, this system can be hijacked by not-so-healthy activities and substances such as alcohol and other drugs. Given that both alcohol and self-harm trigger dopamine release, it’s no wonder the two tend to egg each other on, so to speak. The greater the dopamine boost, the “stickier” the habit — in this case, with tragic results.
Recovery from self-harm involves addressing both the behavior itself and its root causes.
And remember, Reframe is here to help you every step of the way. Our thriving community of folks just like you who have struggled with similar issues and have found a way out are more than happy to support you, offer an empathetic ear, and share their stories.
In the end, the journey to recovery might be a challenging one, but it’s a testament to our strength. As Cheryl Rainfield writes in Scars:
Other times, I look at my scars and see something else: a girl who was trying to cope with something horrible that she should never have had to live through at all. My scars show pain and suffering, but they also show my will to survive. They're part of my history that'll always be there.
Many of us struggle with what seem like impossible situations and difficulties, but rest assured, there’s a way out. We believe in you!
In Girl in Pieces, Kathleen Glasgow writes: “I just want to feel better. My own body is my deepest enemy. It wants, it wants, it wants and when it does not get, it cries and cries and I punish it. How can you live in fear of your own body?”
And yet, so many people develop a painful relationship with what should, in theory, be our closest friend and ally — our own body. Self-harm is, unfortunately, very common and affects people across the globe. But what is it exactly? Is self-harm an addiction? And what is its relationship to alcohol?
The psychology behind self-harm can be complicated, but it comes down to this: it’s an attempt to feel emotional relief through inflicting physical pain on ourselves. It might seem counterintuitive to an outside observer, but at its heart, self-harm is usually a way to overcome overwhelming emotional distress.
While self-harm can consist of any infliction of pain or injury, there are some common patterns, according to SAMHSA:
It’s important to note that there’s a big difference between self-harm and suicidal behavior: the intent is not to end one’s life but rather to find some relief from (what seems at the moment like) an insurmountable emotional obstacle.
While self-harm looks different in each individual case, there are some patterns that scientists and medical professionals have noted over the years. Here’s an overview:
People might describe self-harm as “addictive,” but is it really a true “addiction”? The answer is complex. While self-harm isn’t classified as an addiction by doctors, it does share some common features with substance misuse and addictive behaviors. Here’s an overview:
We’ll return to the role of dopamine in self-harm a bit later when we talk about its connection with alcohol use. For now, let’s get a bit more acquainted with the emotional landscape around self-harm and look at the reasons why people might choose to self-harm.
What is it that prompts us to go against the natural instinct to take care of our bodies and shield ourselves from pain? The reality is, any intense emotion — fear, anger, self-doubt, embarrassment, and so forth — can serve as a trigger. Once we discover a quick way to feel relief from whatever troubles us, it’s easy for that behavior to become a “quick-fix solution” to our problems, even when doing so isn’t in our best interests. As Caroline Kettlewell writes in Skin Game:
You might imagine that a person would resort to self-mutilation only under extremes of duress, but once I'd crossed that line the first time, taken that fateful step off the precipice, then almost any reason was a good enough reason, almost any provocation was provocation enough. Cutting was my all-purpose solution.
As far as science is concerned, there are a few common emotional triggers that lead people to self-injure. From an NCBI article “Why do people self-injure?”:
In the end, the reasons behind NSSI will always be deeply personal and might vary. Regardless of what drives the impulse, it’s essential to be kind to ourselves and realize that there’s no shame in asking for help. There are many caring folks out there who have been where you are and know what it’s like. Don’t lose hope!
Finally, there’s the question of self-harm, alcohol, and other forms of substance misuse. Is there a direct link between them? Do they tend to occur together? Research says that they can — for a number of reasons. Let’s take a closer look.
For one thing, the same reasons that drive us to self-harm can trigger alcohol misuse. Self-harm often co-occurs with other addictions, such as substance abuse, gambling, or eating disorders. This overlap might be due to underlying issues such as anxiety, depression, or trauma, which drive both self-harm and other addictive behaviors. The use of multiple coping mechanisms can make them tricky to untangle, but it’s crucial to do so in order to get better. Occasionally, addictions might “take turns” as we turn to one and then switch to another. This phenomenon is known as “transfer addictions” — to find out more, check out “What Are Transfer Addictions? Examining the Science.”
Research shows that people are more likely to self-harm while drinking. In fact, alcohol was a factor in 21% of self-harm cases, according to one study. There are a few reasons why the two often go together:
As we can see, alcohol’s effects on mood make it a particularly dangerous “partner in crime.” We’re more likely to self-harm when drunk. We are also more likely to experience urges to self-harm because of alcohol’s effects on our mental and emotional state.
But there’s more to the story. Let’s take a deeper look at the dopamine-driven reward system that drives our habits.
As you can see, there are overlapping mechanisms involved in self-harm and alcohol misuse, so the two can be self-reinforcing. Alcohol misuse is driven by dopamine — the reward neurotransmitter that plays an essential role in habit formation and learning. The brain loves habits and keeps them alive through dopamine surges that create feelings of pleasure. There’s an evolutionary reason behind this system: the neurological “reward” is meant to keep us alive by encouraging habits that increase our chances of survival, such as eating, socializing, and finding romantic partners.
Unfortunately, this system can be hijacked by not-so-healthy activities and substances such as alcohol and other drugs. Given that both alcohol and self-harm trigger dopamine release, it’s no wonder the two tend to egg each other on, so to speak. The greater the dopamine boost, the “stickier” the habit — in this case, with tragic results.
Recovery from self-harm involves addressing both the behavior itself and its root causes.
And remember, Reframe is here to help you every step of the way. Our thriving community of folks just like you who have struggled with similar issues and have found a way out are more than happy to support you, offer an empathetic ear, and share their stories.
In the end, the journey to recovery might be a challenging one, but it’s a testament to our strength. As Cheryl Rainfield writes in Scars:
Other times, I look at my scars and see something else: a girl who was trying to cope with something horrible that she should never have had to live through at all. My scars show pain and suffering, but they also show my will to survive. They're part of my history that'll always be there.
Many of us struggle with what seem like impossible situations and difficulties, but rest assured, there’s a way out. We believe in you!
If you’re wondering how to talk to an alcoholic in denial, you’re not alone. Do alcoholics know they are alcoholics? And what can you do to help? Learn all about it in our latest blog.
Although it isn’t a treatment for alcohol use disorder (AUD), the Reframe app can help you cut back on drinking gradually, with the science-backed knowledge to empower you 100% of the way. Our proven program has helped millions of people around the world drink less and live more. And we want to help you get there, too!
The Reframe app equips you with the knowledge and skills you need to not only survive drinking less, but to thrive while you navigate the journey. Our daily research-backed readings teach you the neuroscience of alcohol, and our in-app Toolkit provides the resources and activities you need to navigate each challenge.
You’ll meet millions of fellow Reframers in our 24/7 Forum chat and daily Zoom check-in meetings. Receive encouragement from people worldwide who know exactly what you’re going through! You’ll also have the opportunity to connect with our licensed Reframe coaches for more personalized guidance.
Plus, we’re always introducing new features to optimize your in-app experience. We recently launched our in-app chatbot, Melody, powered by the world’s most powerful AI technology. Melody is here to help as you adjust to a life with less (or no) alcohol.
And that’s not all! Every month, we launch fun challenges, like Dry/Damp January, Mental Health May, and Outdoorsy June. You won’t want to miss out on the chance to participate alongside fellow Reframers (or solo if that’s more your thing!).
The Reframe app is free for 7 days, so you don’t have anything to lose by trying it. Are you ready to feel empowered and discover life beyond alcohol? Then download our app through the App Store or Google Play today!
It might start small. Maybe they seem to be going out every weekend. Then the weekend starts on Thursday, then Wednesday. First, the reasons to drink might sound more like reasons to celebrate. (“It’s trivia night! It’s Margarita Wednesday at the bar!”) Then excuses and justifications start coming up. (“It was a work event — I had to drink, or I’d stand out.” “A friend was in town this Tuesday, she dragged me to this bar, I wasn’t even planning to go.” “I had a rough lunch with the in-laws, that calls for a margarita, doesn’t it?”) Then come the hurtful comments, the wine breath in the middle of the afternoon, the bottles you happen to see sticking out of the hamper or hear as they clink in their backpack.
The problem? They say they’re fine. That they’re in control. That it was a one-time thing. Whatever the situation is, though, you know it’s only going to get worse. But what can you do? You take your questions to Google, searching “how to talk to an alcoholic in denial,” “do alcoholics know they are alcoholics,” and so forth. Until you’re thoroughly confused. Everyone has something different to say about alcoholism denial, and you’re no closer to getting an actual answer. Let’s clear it up, shall we?
First things first: let’s take a step back and see what we’re dealing with. Most of us will come into contact with the negative effects of alcohol on someone close to us, and some of us might even struggle with it ourselves. Alcohol has a sneaky way of taking over — not just our evenings, but months, years, and decades of our lives.
Here’s how Annie Grace describes it in This Naked Mind: “Alcohol erases a bit of you every time you drink it. It can even erase entire nights when you are on a binge. Alcohol does not relieve stress; it erases your senses and your ability to think. Alcohol ultimately erases your self.”
But why does alcohol hold such power over some of us? And what does being an “alcoholic” actually mean? Let’s take a deeper look.
Alcoholism — better known as alcohol use disorder (AUD) in the medical community — refers to a physical dependence on alcohol that sets in after a period of misuse. It can take years (or even decades) to develop, and some of us might be more vulnerable than others for reasons that have to do with genetics, social circumstances, or emotional tendencies. Ultimately, however, nobody is immune: alcohol is an addictive substance that causes shifts in brain chemistry, making it increasingly difficult to take a step back.
The change can be gradual, and it can be hard to pinpoint when problem drinking changes into misuse and dependence. Sometimes it might be more obvious from the outside perspective, but usually the person sliding into alcohol
Understanding the nature of alcoholism as a chronic disease can help us approach our loved one with empathy and patience. Organizations like the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism provide resources that can help deepen your understanding. Also, check out “Alcoholism: Genetic Disease or Lifestyle Choice? Debunking Myths” and “I Drink Every Night. Am I an Alcoholic?” to learn more.)
And denial? Well, unfortunately denial comes with the territory. In fact, it’s the running theme in most lists outlining the typical symptoms of AUD and shows up as a symptom in about 30% to over 50% of those with AUD or another substance use disorder (SUD).
Here’s how denial might show up:
The way these signs show up might be different from one person to the next, but the overall trend is clear: things are getting worse, and they’re getting worse quickly. Faced with this realization, we might find ourselves feeling desperate for a lifeline. But what can we do?
If you’re wondering how to talk to an alcoholic in denial, you’re not alone. Thousands of others have been in the difficult position you’re in today. And while the road ahead might be a long one, rest assured that recovery is possible! In the meantime, there are several tangible ways you can help your loved one start their journey.
First and foremost: it’s important to make our loved one feel safe to talk about what’s happening in a nonjudgmental environment. While it might seem as if they are oblivious to the problem, chances are there’s already an internal struggle going on inside them. Sometimes all it takes is an opportunity to let it out and reveal what’s going on to someone they trust.
To help them share their experience, be prepared to listen more than you talk. Don’t worry that you’re not “doing enough,” and don’t get overly involved in planning their path to recovery — there will be time for that in the future. The journey has to start with an active decision on their part, and this might take some time. Be patient, be there, and simply listen. Allowing your loved one to express their thoughts and feelings without interruption can foster openness and reduce defensiveness.
When you do talk, try to use "I" statements to express your concerns without sounding accusatory. For example, say, "I feel worried about how much you're drinking, and I care about your health," instead of "You're always drinking too much!"
(Want to dig deeper? Check out “How To Help a Friend Who Is Struggling With Alcohol Misuse” and “Supporting a Loved One: How To Help an Alcoholic on the Path to Recovery.)
It can be difficult to tell where the line between being empathic and enabling is, but it’s an important one. Enabling can take many forms, but the bottom line is that it can unintentionally prolong both the denial and the addiction. Here are some examples:
Difficult as it may be, it’s crucial to set boundaries in these situations. If possible, talk to your friend or loved one when they’re sober to make sure you’re on the same page. Be clear about what the boundaries are, and then make sure to stick to them. For example, you might decide not to be around them when they are drinking, not to cover for them when it comes to explaining their behavior to others, or not to take over their responsibilities at work or at home. (To learn more, take a look at “What Does It Mean Enabling an Alcoholic?”)
They get more and more rare, but they happen. Try to catch them before they close, as they’re precious moments when your loved one might be more receptive to help.
Sometimes windows of opportunity open during moments of clarity, when the horror of the situation suddenly hits home. Other times they might come up during times when it becomes impossible to ignore the effects that alcohol is having on your loved one’s life — for example, right after losing a job or a partner. Be gentle, but be present. If they’re going to be receptive to help and honest advice, this is the time.
The window is open? Hooray! Let’s grab the opportunity.
Gently suggest the idea of seeking help from a professional, such as a therapist or a doctor. Print out the information or write it down clearly. Remember, for someone who is under the influence a good part of the day, simple things become a challenge. (It’s not a dig, it’s just the reality of the situation.)
Don’t be discouraged or take it personally if they stash it in the back of the closet, throw it in the wastebasket, or even tell you off. Chances are, they’ll fish it out of the trash when you leave and might at least look it over and stow it away for future reference (trust us, it’s been known to happen!). When the moment is right, this information could be lifesaving.
If they do decide to take you up on the offer, do what you can to make it possible. Make calls to detox centers, get in touch with members of groups, and drive them to appointments if you can. Help is there and it’s available, but logistics can sometimes get in the way, especially with the fog of AUD making daily tasks difficult. You’re doing an amazing job, and every little bit helps — don’t underestimate the power of these “small” gestures!
Last but certainly not least, if you’ve been where your loved one is yourself, share your story. There’s absolutely nothing as valuable as knowing that someone who has been caught in the same trap has found a way out. Don’t share details if you don’t want to, but please share the hope. It can be a lifeline.
Finally, don’t lose hope in the process, daunting as it may be. As Russell Brand writes in Recovery: Freedom from Our Addiction, “You need only allow gentle hope to enter your heart. Exhale and allow hope, and give yourself some time. This is a process of change that requires a good deal of self-compassion, which is neither stagnant nor permissive. We can just start by being a little kinder to ourselves and open to the possibility that life doesn’t have to be bloody awful.” Trust the millions who’ve been where you are and found a light at the end of the tunnel.
It might start small. Maybe they seem to be going out every weekend. Then the weekend starts on Thursday, then Wednesday. First, the reasons to drink might sound more like reasons to celebrate. (“It’s trivia night! It’s Margarita Wednesday at the bar!”) Then excuses and justifications start coming up. (“It was a work event — I had to drink, or I’d stand out.” “A friend was in town this Tuesday, she dragged me to this bar, I wasn’t even planning to go.” “I had a rough lunch with the in-laws, that calls for a margarita, doesn’t it?”) Then come the hurtful comments, the wine breath in the middle of the afternoon, the bottles you happen to see sticking out of the hamper or hear as they clink in their backpack.
The problem? They say they’re fine. That they’re in control. That it was a one-time thing. Whatever the situation is, though, you know it’s only going to get worse. But what can you do? You take your questions to Google, searching “how to talk to an alcoholic in denial,” “do alcoholics know they are alcoholics,” and so forth. Until you’re thoroughly confused. Everyone has something different to say about alcoholism denial, and you’re no closer to getting an actual answer. Let’s clear it up, shall we?
First things first: let’s take a step back and see what we’re dealing with. Most of us will come into contact with the negative effects of alcohol on someone close to us, and some of us might even struggle with it ourselves. Alcohol has a sneaky way of taking over — not just our evenings, but months, years, and decades of our lives.
Here’s how Annie Grace describes it in This Naked Mind: “Alcohol erases a bit of you every time you drink it. It can even erase entire nights when you are on a binge. Alcohol does not relieve stress; it erases your senses and your ability to think. Alcohol ultimately erases your self.”
But why does alcohol hold such power over some of us? And what does being an “alcoholic” actually mean? Let’s take a deeper look.
Alcoholism — better known as alcohol use disorder (AUD) in the medical community — refers to a physical dependence on alcohol that sets in after a period of misuse. It can take years (or even decades) to develop, and some of us might be more vulnerable than others for reasons that have to do with genetics, social circumstances, or emotional tendencies. Ultimately, however, nobody is immune: alcohol is an addictive substance that causes shifts in brain chemistry, making it increasingly difficult to take a step back.
The change can be gradual, and it can be hard to pinpoint when problem drinking changes into misuse and dependence. Sometimes it might be more obvious from the outside perspective, but usually the person sliding into alcohol
Understanding the nature of alcoholism as a chronic disease can help us approach our loved one with empathy and patience. Organizations like the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism provide resources that can help deepen your understanding. Also, check out “Alcoholism: Genetic Disease or Lifestyle Choice? Debunking Myths” and “I Drink Every Night. Am I an Alcoholic?” to learn more.)
And denial? Well, unfortunately denial comes with the territory. In fact, it’s the running theme in most lists outlining the typical symptoms of AUD and shows up as a symptom in about 30% to over 50% of those with AUD or another substance use disorder (SUD).
Here’s how denial might show up:
The way these signs show up might be different from one person to the next, but the overall trend is clear: things are getting worse, and they’re getting worse quickly. Faced with this realization, we might find ourselves feeling desperate for a lifeline. But what can we do?
If you’re wondering how to talk to an alcoholic in denial, you’re not alone. Thousands of others have been in the difficult position you’re in today. And while the road ahead might be a long one, rest assured that recovery is possible! In the meantime, there are several tangible ways you can help your loved one start their journey.
First and foremost: it’s important to make our loved one feel safe to talk about what’s happening in a nonjudgmental environment. While it might seem as if they are oblivious to the problem, chances are there’s already an internal struggle going on inside them. Sometimes all it takes is an opportunity to let it out and reveal what’s going on to someone they trust.
To help them share their experience, be prepared to listen more than you talk. Don’t worry that you’re not “doing enough,” and don’t get overly involved in planning their path to recovery — there will be time for that in the future. The journey has to start with an active decision on their part, and this might take some time. Be patient, be there, and simply listen. Allowing your loved one to express their thoughts and feelings without interruption can foster openness and reduce defensiveness.
When you do talk, try to use "I" statements to express your concerns without sounding accusatory. For example, say, "I feel worried about how much you're drinking, and I care about your health," instead of "You're always drinking too much!"
(Want to dig deeper? Check out “How To Help a Friend Who Is Struggling With Alcohol Misuse” and “Supporting a Loved One: How To Help an Alcoholic on the Path to Recovery.)
It can be difficult to tell where the line between being empathic and enabling is, but it’s an important one. Enabling can take many forms, but the bottom line is that it can unintentionally prolong both the denial and the addiction. Here are some examples:
Difficult as it may be, it’s crucial to set boundaries in these situations. If possible, talk to your friend or loved one when they’re sober to make sure you’re on the same page. Be clear about what the boundaries are, and then make sure to stick to them. For example, you might decide not to be around them when they are drinking, not to cover for them when it comes to explaining their behavior to others, or not to take over their responsibilities at work or at home. (To learn more, take a look at “What Does It Mean Enabling an Alcoholic?”)
They get more and more rare, but they happen. Try to catch them before they close, as they’re precious moments when your loved one might be more receptive to help.
Sometimes windows of opportunity open during moments of clarity, when the horror of the situation suddenly hits home. Other times they might come up during times when it becomes impossible to ignore the effects that alcohol is having on your loved one’s life — for example, right after losing a job or a partner. Be gentle, but be present. If they’re going to be receptive to help and honest advice, this is the time.
The window is open? Hooray! Let’s grab the opportunity.
Gently suggest the idea of seeking help from a professional, such as a therapist or a doctor. Print out the information or write it down clearly. Remember, for someone who is under the influence a good part of the day, simple things become a challenge. (It’s not a dig, it’s just the reality of the situation.)
Don’t be discouraged or take it personally if they stash it in the back of the closet, throw it in the wastebasket, or even tell you off. Chances are, they’ll fish it out of the trash when you leave and might at least look it over and stow it away for future reference (trust us, it’s been known to happen!). When the moment is right, this information could be lifesaving.
If they do decide to take you up on the offer, do what you can to make it possible. Make calls to detox centers, get in touch with members of groups, and drive them to appointments if you can. Help is there and it’s available, but logistics can sometimes get in the way, especially with the fog of AUD making daily tasks difficult. You’re doing an amazing job, and every little bit helps — don’t underestimate the power of these “small” gestures!
Last but certainly not least, if you’ve been where your loved one is yourself, share your story. There’s absolutely nothing as valuable as knowing that someone who has been caught in the same trap has found a way out. Don’t share details if you don’t want to, but please share the hope. It can be a lifeline.
Finally, don’t lose hope in the process, daunting as it may be. As Russell Brand writes in Recovery: Freedom from Our Addiction, “You need only allow gentle hope to enter your heart. Exhale and allow hope, and give yourself some time. This is a process of change that requires a good deal of self-compassion, which is neither stagnant nor permissive. We can just start by being a little kinder to ourselves and open to the possibility that life doesn’t have to be bloody awful.” Trust the millions who’ve been where you are and found a light at the end of the tunnel.
Alcohol is a depressant that slows down brain function and affects mood, motor skills, and mental health. Learn more about its impact and make informed choices today!
Although it isn’t a treatment for alcohol use disorder (AUD), the Reframe app can help you cut back on drinking gradually, with the science-backed knowledge to empower you 100% of the way. Our proven program has helped millions of people around the world drink less and live more. And we want to help you get there, too!
The Reframe app equips you with the knowledge and skills you need to not only survive drinking less, but to thrive while you navigate the journey. Our daily research-backed readings teach you the neuroscience of alcohol, and our in-app Toolkit provides the resources and activities you need to navigate each challenge.
You’ll meet hundreds of fellow Reframers in our 24/7 Forum chat and daily Zoom check-in meetings. Receive encouragement from people worldwide who know exactly what you’re going through! You’ll also have the opportunity to connect with our licensed Reframe coaches for more personalized guidance.
Plus, we’re always introducing new features to optimize your in-app experience. We recently launched our in-app chatbot, Melody, powered by the world’s most powerful AI technology. Melody is here to help as you adjust to a life with less (or no) alcohol.
And that’s not all! Every month, we launch fun challenges, like Dry/Damp January, Mental Health May, and Outdoorsy June. You won’t want to miss out on the chance to participate alongside fellow Reframers (or solo if that’s more your thing!).
The Reframe app is free for 7 days, so you don’t have anything to lose by trying it. Are you ready to feel empowered and discover life beyond alcohol? Then download our app through the App Store or Google Play today!
Alcohol is a widely consumed beverage that has significant effects on the mind and body. Despite its popularity, many people are unaware that alcohol is classified as a depressant. This article delves into what it means for alcohol to be a depressant, how it functions in this capacity, and how it compares to other depressants.
Depressants are a class of drugs that reduce the activity of the central nervous system (CNS). They are often prescribed to treat conditions such as anxiety, insomnia, and seizures. Common effects of depressants include sedation, muscle relaxation, and reduced anxiety. These substances work by enhancing the activity of gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA), a neurotransmitter that inhibits brain activity.
Alcohol impacts the central nervous system by enhancing the effects of GABA, similar to other depressants. When you drink alcohol, GABA activity increases, leading to a slowing down of brain function. This results in the characteristic effects of alcohol consumption, such as impaired judgment, motor skills, and cognitive functions.
Alcohol shares several characteristics with other depressants but also has unique aspects that set it apart.
Understanding that alcohol is a depressant can help individuals make more informed choices about their drinking habits. The depressant effects of alcohol can have both short-term and long-term impacts on mental and physical health.
Building healthier drinking habits involves understanding the risks associated with alcohol and making conscious choices to moderate consumption.
Alcohol is classified as a depressant because it slows down the central nervous system, leading to decreased brain activity and relaxation.
Alcohol can exacerbate mental health conditions like depression and anxiety. Chronic use can lead to long-term cognitive impairments.
While alcohol and other depressants share similar risks, alcohol is more widely available and socially accepted, which can lead to higher rates of abuse and addiction.
It is generally not recommended to drink alcohol while taking antidepressants, as it can interfere with the medication's effectiveness and exacerbate side effects. For more details, see Should You Drink Alcohol While Taking Antidepressants?.
Long-term alcohol use can lead to liver disease, cardiovascular problems, mental health issues, and cognitive impairments.
Understanding alcohol as a depressant can help you make more informed choices about your drinking habits, ultimately leading to a healthier relationship with alcohol.
Alcohol is a widely consumed beverage that has significant effects on the mind and body. Despite its popularity, many people are unaware that alcohol is classified as a depressant. This article delves into what it means for alcohol to be a depressant, how it functions in this capacity, and how it compares to other depressants.
Depressants are a class of drugs that reduce the activity of the central nervous system (CNS). They are often prescribed to treat conditions such as anxiety, insomnia, and seizures. Common effects of depressants include sedation, muscle relaxation, and reduced anxiety. These substances work by enhancing the activity of gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA), a neurotransmitter that inhibits brain activity.
Alcohol impacts the central nervous system by enhancing the effects of GABA, similar to other depressants. When you drink alcohol, GABA activity increases, leading to a slowing down of brain function. This results in the characteristic effects of alcohol consumption, such as impaired judgment, motor skills, and cognitive functions.
Alcohol shares several characteristics with other depressants but also has unique aspects that set it apart.
Understanding that alcohol is a depressant can help individuals make more informed choices about their drinking habits. The depressant effects of alcohol can have both short-term and long-term impacts on mental and physical health.
Building healthier drinking habits involves understanding the risks associated with alcohol and making conscious choices to moderate consumption.
Alcohol is classified as a depressant because it slows down the central nervous system, leading to decreased brain activity and relaxation.
Alcohol can exacerbate mental health conditions like depression and anxiety. Chronic use can lead to long-term cognitive impairments.
While alcohol and other depressants share similar risks, alcohol is more widely available and socially accepted, which can lead to higher rates of abuse and addiction.
It is generally not recommended to drink alcohol while taking antidepressants, as it can interfere with the medication's effectiveness and exacerbate side effects. For more details, see Should You Drink Alcohol While Taking Antidepressants?.
Long-term alcohol use can lead to liver disease, cardiovascular problems, mental health issues, and cognitive impairments.
Understanding alcohol as a depressant can help you make more informed choices about your drinking habits, ultimately leading to a healthier relationship with alcohol.
Loving an addict can be challenging and heartbreaking, but there’s hope! Check out or blog for 15 inspirational addiction quotes for family and loved ones of those who are struggling.
Although it isn’t a treatment for alcohol use disorder (AUD), the Reframe app can help you cut back on drinking gradually, with the science-backed knowledge to empower you 100% of the way. Our proven program has helped millions of people around the world drink less and live more. And we want to help you get there, too!
The Reframe app equips you with the knowledge and skills you need to not only survive drinking less, but to thrive while you navigate the journey. Our daily research-backed readings teach you the neuroscience of alcohol, and our in-app Toolkit provides the resources and activities you need to navigate each challenge.
You’ll meet hundreds of fellow Reframers in our 24/7 Forum chat and daily Zoom check-in meetings. Receive encouragement from people worldwide who know exactly what you’re going through! You’ll also have the opportunity to connect with our licensed Reframe coaches for more personalized guidance.
Plus, we’re always introducing new features to optimize your in-app experience. We recently launched our in-app chatbot, Melody, powered by the world’s most powerful AI technology. Melody is here to help as you adjust to a life with less (or no) alcohol.
And that’s not all! Every month, we launch fun challenges, like Dry/Damp January, Mental Health May, and Outdoorsy June. You won’t want to miss out on the chance to participate alongside fellow Reframers (or solo if that’s more your thing!).
The Reframe app is free for 7 days, so you don’t have anything to lose by trying it. Are you ready to feel empowered and discover life beyond alcohol? Then download our app through the App Store or Google Play today!
Addiction often changes our loved ones into people we might no longer recognize. Sometimes the changes take years, sometimes months, or even a few weeks. Either way, you start noticing that your friend, partner, child, or even parent is slowly turning into someone you don’t recognize. Maybe they’re spending more time out (or in their room), maybe they’re canceling plans, lying, or even stealing from you. Recovery feels like it’s within reach (“If only they’d just stop!”) and yet so incredibly far — almost impossible — at the same time.
Rest assured, it’s possible. Many have recovered from addiction, and your loved one can, too! In the meantime, you can learn how to support your friend or family member while taking care of your own mental and physical health.
Loving an addict can be one of the most frustrating, exhausting, and heartbreaking experiences. As Emilie Pine puts it in Notes to Self,
“It is hard to love an addict. Not only practically difficult, in the picking up after them and the handling of those aspects of life they're not able for themselves, but metaphysically hard. It feels like bashing yourself against a wall, not just your head, but your whole self. It makes your heart hard. Caught between ultimatums (stop drinking) and radical acceptance (I love you no matter what) the person who loves the addict exhausts and renews their love on a daily basis.”
And yet, if that’s you — you’re certainly not alone. According to NIAAA’s 2022 National Survey on Drug Use and Health (NSDUH), as many as 29.5 million people ages 12 and older had alcohol use disorder (AUD) in the past year. Add to that the millions of cases of drug addiction, and the numbers are truly staggering.
If you’re in this boat, please don’t lose hope! Recovery is absolutely possible. In the meantime, be sure to take care of yourself. (For a deeper look at this subject, check out our blogs: Supporting a Loved One: How To Help an Alcoholic on the Path to Recovery and How To Help Your Teen With Alcohol Recovery.)
Hearing about others’ experiences can be incredibly helpful, and getting help and support for yourself in the process is also essential. Quotes can be an important part of this process by helping you reframe the situation, gain perspective, understand addiction, and know that recovery is possible.
Addiction is a paradox. It’s a lonely state to be in, and yet it affects everyone in the surrounding community in ways that can be hard to untangle. Here are some quotes to shed light on what makes addiction tick.
1. “Drinkers think they are trying to escape, but really they are trying to overcome a mental disorder they didn't know they had.” ― Matthew Perry, Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing
While people naturally look for the “why” behind addiction, the truth is that at a certain point, the psychological or environmental factors that may have triggered that first dose or first drink are largely irrelevant. Once addiction gets going, it’s a physical process driven by changes in brain chemistry.
Biologically, addiction sets in as a result of the brain’s reward system going haywire. Driven by dopamine, the reward neurochemical, it’s a cycle of dependence that sets in when we come to rely on substances (such as alcohol) that artificially trigger the reward circuit.
However, that doesn’t mean the brain can’t change — it absolutely can, thanks to the power of neuroplasticity. (To learn more, check out “How Alcohol Affects the Brain: A Look Into the Science.”)
2. “We’re all running from pain. Some of us take pills. Some of us couch surf while binge-watching Netflix. Some of us read romance novels. We’ll do almost anything to distract ourselves from ourselves. Yet all this trying to insulate ourselves from pain seems only to have made our pain worse.” ― Anna Lembke, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence
Addiction seems a bit less foreign if we think of it in terms of degrees. We all have the potential to be “dopamine junkies,” chasing after things that make us feel good. It’s natural! However, for one reason or another (most likely a combination of genetics, life circumstances, and pure chance), some of us are a bit more sensitive to the effects and end up getting caught up in a devastating spiral.
3. “No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.” — Buddha
One of the main (and also most frustrating) things to understand about addiction is that we can’t fix it for someone else — they must do so by themselves. You can help by pointing your loved one in the right direction and offering tools and advice (especially if you’ve been there yourself at some point). However, in the end it’s their puzzle to solve.
Is it a solvable puzzle, however? Absolutely. The key lies in changing our relationship with alcohol or another drug: once we see through the illusion of pleasure it supposedly creates and the empty promises it never actually delivers on, quitting becomes simple. The great news? Once we reframe our understanding in this way, it’s almost impossible to “unsee” the new reality.
Family and friends can find it incredibly difficult to find balance in life when addiction is in the picture. How do we support our loved one without enabling them? Can we ever bring back the person we knew and loved who seems to be a shell of their former self?
While we can’t “make” someone recover, we can help ignite a spark of inspiration that could eventually lead to change. Here are some quotes about doing just that (as well as some about what to avoid).
4. “My identity shifted when I got into recovery. That’s who I am now, and it actually gives me greater pleasure to have that identity than to be a musician or anything else. It gives me a spiritual anchor.” — Eric Clapton
Our passions can be a lifeline in recovery. Encourage the addict you love to pursue what once made them happy. Whatever it was is still there, even if it’s been obscured by alcohol or drugs. That guitar they used to play but haven’t touched in years? Ask them to play you a song (just one, for a few minutes). A lot of times a few minutes of going back to what used to give us joy can serve as a “hook,” if not now then at some point in the future.
5. “I used to spend so much time reacting and responding to everyone else that my life had no direction. Other people's lives, problems, and wants set the course for my life. Once I realized it was okay for me to think about and identify what I wanted, remarkable things began to take place in my life.” ― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency
At the same time, don’t forget yourself in the process. What gives you joy? Is it music? Hiking? Making photo collages? Don’t let any emotional turmoil around you stop you from taking a few minutes each day to do something that brings you joy. It’s not selfish — it’s actually the opposite. It will keep you going and keep you from losing the connection to your authentic self.
6. “We rescue people from their responsibilities. We take care of people’s responsibilities for them. Later we get mad at them for what we’ve done. Then we feel used and sorry for ourselves. That is the pattern, the triangle.” ― Melody Beattie, Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
Another wise thought from Melody Beattie, this one gets to the heart of what happens when we don’t leave room for ourselves in the process of caring for an addict. It can feel like an impossible cycle to break: our loved one clearly can’t take care of their own basic needs, so we stock their fridge, pay their bills, walk their dog, and help drive them to appointments with medical professionals we hope they’ll listen to. And yet we also resent them for it.
How you find balance in this vicious cycle (or triangle, as Beattie calls it) is up to you. The key is to not overextend yourself — ask others for help, don’t blame yourself for not being Superman (or Superwoman). You already are a hero by being there for your loved one. But you’re also human.
Watching a parent struggle with addiction can be heartbreaking and confusing. After all, these are the people that are supposed to care for us — and yet, we often end up as the caretakers. Here are some thoughts others have shared that can help you cope.
7. “We are lovable. Even if the most important person in your world rejects you, you are still real, and you are still okay.” ― Melody Beattie, Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
First and foremost, when our parents struggle with addiction, it can feel as if we don’t matter — but we do. You matter, and you deserve to be loved and cared for.
8. “Our parents can show us a lot of things: they can show us how we are to be and what things we ought to strive for, or they can show us how not to be and what things we ought to stray from.” ― C. JoyBell C.
Reframing the situation as an important lesson (although, maybe not a welcome one) can help you be more at peace with it. Ideally, our parents serve as guides for how to behave and interact with the world, and it’s easy to feel that the world “owes” us something if they weren’t. But they might also show us what mistakes not to repeat — and there’s value in those lessons as well.
9. “Detaching does not mean we don’t care. It means we learn to love, care, and be involved without going crazy.” ― Melody Beattie, Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
Sometimes, there’s simply nothing we can do at the moment to change the situation. And difficult as it may be, it’s okay to take a step back. There’s always hope in the future, but in the meantime, it’s fine (and maybe even necessary) to close certain doors.
Unfortunately, sometimes no matter what we do, the outcome can be tragic. Many have lost loved ones to addiction. Here are some quotes to cope with loss.
10. “Tears shed for another person are not a sign of weakness. They are a sign of a pure heart.” ― José N. Harris, Mi Vida: A Story of Faith, Hope and Love
The pain never completely goes away, and it’s never wrong to feel it. Try to see it as the evidence of love for the dear friend or family member who will always be with you in spirit.
11. “We are all the pieces of what we remember. We hold in ourselves the hopes and fears of those who love us. As long as there is love and memory, there is no true loss.” ― Cassandra Clare, City of Heavenly Fire
While it’s never wrong to feel our pain, it’s also never wrong to let it change and become a source of inspiration. The hardest experiences can transform into something meaningful with time.
12. “Life seems sometimes like nothing more than a series of losses, from beginning to end. That's the given. How you respond to those losses, what you make of what's left, that's the part you have to make up as you go.” ― Katharine Weber, The Music Lesson
Transcending pain is all about accepting the loss while making something meaningful out of the experience. For example, when (and if) you’re ready, you could be a lifeline for someone who is facing similar challenges.
Once dependence on a substance sets in, the addict’s personality and behaviors inevitably change. It can seem like all they want is to find their drug of choice — whether that’s a bottle of wine at the local store (or hidden in the hamper), a drug they bought from a seedy dealer, or even a prescription they lied about misusing. These quotes shed light on the situation.
13. “I have no power at all over people, places and things, and if I ever for a moment mistakenly believe that I do, and act as if I do, pain is on its way.” ― Russell Brand, Recovery: Freedom from Our Addictions
While this quote refers to the experience of an addict (who has recovered and is now helping others do the same!), it’s equally relevant to the experience of family and loved ones. For better or worse, what happens outside of our control isn’t up to us.
14. “We don’t have to take things so personally. We take things to heart that we have no business taking to heart. For instance, saying ‘If you loved me you wouldn’t drink’ to an alcoholic makes as much sense as saying ‘If you loved me, you wouldn’t cough’ to someone who has pneumonia.” ― Melody Beattie, Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
Remember how we said that addiction is a physical process that gains momentum without our control? Understanding the nature of addiction — so painful to witness and experience firsthand — can ultimately help us.
15. “Sometimes, no matter how hard we try for someone and hope that they will get better in time — they never do. Abusive relationships shouldn’t have a key to your chambers of heart. Hold your key and keep it close. Don’t end up getting addicted to such pain or human beings — for that matter. You might not be Thor but they can surely be Loki and hold you prisoner to their trickster nature.” ― Sijdah Hussain, Red Sugar, No More
It’s easier said than done to point out that the actions of others are not up to us to control. There’s always that small glimmer of hope that maybe “this time will be different.” And sometimes it is!
But the truth is, even if the situation doesn’t change, you have another important life to protect — your own. And that’s not only an option, it’s actually your most important responsibility.
In the end, addiction leaves a mark on everyone who experiences it — whether firsthand or as a witness. But there’s hope! Thousands of people (many of them part of the Reframe community) have found the light of recovery at the end of the tunnel and are leading happier, healthier lives than they ever thought possible. We wish you the best of luck on your journey. Remember, the Reframe community is here to support you along the way.
Addiction often changes our loved ones into people we might no longer recognize. Sometimes the changes take years, sometimes months, or even a few weeks. Either way, you start noticing that your friend, partner, child, or even parent is slowly turning into someone you don’t recognize. Maybe they’re spending more time out (or in their room), maybe they’re canceling plans, lying, or even stealing from you. Recovery feels like it’s within reach (“If only they’d just stop!”) and yet so incredibly far — almost impossible — at the same time.
Rest assured, it’s possible. Many have recovered from addiction, and your loved one can, too! In the meantime, you can learn how to support your friend or family member while taking care of your own mental and physical health.
Loving an addict can be one of the most frustrating, exhausting, and heartbreaking experiences. As Emilie Pine puts it in Notes to Self,
“It is hard to love an addict. Not only practically difficult, in the picking up after them and the handling of those aspects of life they're not able for themselves, but metaphysically hard. It feels like bashing yourself against a wall, not just your head, but your whole self. It makes your heart hard. Caught between ultimatums (stop drinking) and radical acceptance (I love you no matter what) the person who loves the addict exhausts and renews their love on a daily basis.”
And yet, if that’s you — you’re certainly not alone. According to NIAAA’s 2022 National Survey on Drug Use and Health (NSDUH), as many as 29.5 million people ages 12 and older had alcohol use disorder (AUD) in the past year. Add to that the millions of cases of drug addiction, and the numbers are truly staggering.
If you’re in this boat, please don’t lose hope! Recovery is absolutely possible. In the meantime, be sure to take care of yourself. (For a deeper look at this subject, check out our blogs: Supporting a Loved One: How To Help an Alcoholic on the Path to Recovery and How To Help Your Teen With Alcohol Recovery.)
Hearing about others’ experiences can be incredibly helpful, and getting help and support for yourself in the process is also essential. Quotes can be an important part of this process by helping you reframe the situation, gain perspective, understand addiction, and know that recovery is possible.
Addiction is a paradox. It’s a lonely state to be in, and yet it affects everyone in the surrounding community in ways that can be hard to untangle. Here are some quotes to shed light on what makes addiction tick.
1. “Drinkers think they are trying to escape, but really they are trying to overcome a mental disorder they didn't know they had.” ― Matthew Perry, Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing
While people naturally look for the “why” behind addiction, the truth is that at a certain point, the psychological or environmental factors that may have triggered that first dose or first drink are largely irrelevant. Once addiction gets going, it’s a physical process driven by changes in brain chemistry.
Biologically, addiction sets in as a result of the brain’s reward system going haywire. Driven by dopamine, the reward neurochemical, it’s a cycle of dependence that sets in when we come to rely on substances (such as alcohol) that artificially trigger the reward circuit.
However, that doesn’t mean the brain can’t change — it absolutely can, thanks to the power of neuroplasticity. (To learn more, check out “How Alcohol Affects the Brain: A Look Into the Science.”)
2. “We’re all running from pain. Some of us take pills. Some of us couch surf while binge-watching Netflix. Some of us read romance novels. We’ll do almost anything to distract ourselves from ourselves. Yet all this trying to insulate ourselves from pain seems only to have made our pain worse.” ― Anna Lembke, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence
Addiction seems a bit less foreign if we think of it in terms of degrees. We all have the potential to be “dopamine junkies,” chasing after things that make us feel good. It’s natural! However, for one reason or another (most likely a combination of genetics, life circumstances, and pure chance), some of us are a bit more sensitive to the effects and end up getting caught up in a devastating spiral.
3. “No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.” — Buddha
One of the main (and also most frustrating) things to understand about addiction is that we can’t fix it for someone else — they must do so by themselves. You can help by pointing your loved one in the right direction and offering tools and advice (especially if you’ve been there yourself at some point). However, in the end it’s their puzzle to solve.
Is it a solvable puzzle, however? Absolutely. The key lies in changing our relationship with alcohol or another drug: once we see through the illusion of pleasure it supposedly creates and the empty promises it never actually delivers on, quitting becomes simple. The great news? Once we reframe our understanding in this way, it’s almost impossible to “unsee” the new reality.
Family and friends can find it incredibly difficult to find balance in life when addiction is in the picture. How do we support our loved one without enabling them? Can we ever bring back the person we knew and loved who seems to be a shell of their former self?
While we can’t “make” someone recover, we can help ignite a spark of inspiration that could eventually lead to change. Here are some quotes about doing just that (as well as some about what to avoid).
4. “My identity shifted when I got into recovery. That’s who I am now, and it actually gives me greater pleasure to have that identity than to be a musician or anything else. It gives me a spiritual anchor.” — Eric Clapton
Our passions can be a lifeline in recovery. Encourage the addict you love to pursue what once made them happy. Whatever it was is still there, even if it’s been obscured by alcohol or drugs. That guitar they used to play but haven’t touched in years? Ask them to play you a song (just one, for a few minutes). A lot of times a few minutes of going back to what used to give us joy can serve as a “hook,” if not now then at some point in the future.
5. “I used to spend so much time reacting and responding to everyone else that my life had no direction. Other people's lives, problems, and wants set the course for my life. Once I realized it was okay for me to think about and identify what I wanted, remarkable things began to take place in my life.” ― Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency
At the same time, don’t forget yourself in the process. What gives you joy? Is it music? Hiking? Making photo collages? Don’t let any emotional turmoil around you stop you from taking a few minutes each day to do something that brings you joy. It’s not selfish — it’s actually the opposite. It will keep you going and keep you from losing the connection to your authentic self.
6. “We rescue people from their responsibilities. We take care of people’s responsibilities for them. Later we get mad at them for what we’ve done. Then we feel used and sorry for ourselves. That is the pattern, the triangle.” ― Melody Beattie, Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
Another wise thought from Melody Beattie, this one gets to the heart of what happens when we don’t leave room for ourselves in the process of caring for an addict. It can feel like an impossible cycle to break: our loved one clearly can’t take care of their own basic needs, so we stock their fridge, pay their bills, walk their dog, and help drive them to appointments with medical professionals we hope they’ll listen to. And yet we also resent them for it.
How you find balance in this vicious cycle (or triangle, as Beattie calls it) is up to you. The key is to not overextend yourself — ask others for help, don’t blame yourself for not being Superman (or Superwoman). You already are a hero by being there for your loved one. But you’re also human.
Watching a parent struggle with addiction can be heartbreaking and confusing. After all, these are the people that are supposed to care for us — and yet, we often end up as the caretakers. Here are some thoughts others have shared that can help you cope.
7. “We are lovable. Even if the most important person in your world rejects you, you are still real, and you are still okay.” ― Melody Beattie, Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
First and foremost, when our parents struggle with addiction, it can feel as if we don’t matter — but we do. You matter, and you deserve to be loved and cared for.
8. “Our parents can show us a lot of things: they can show us how we are to be and what things we ought to strive for, or they can show us how not to be and what things we ought to stray from.” ― C. JoyBell C.
Reframing the situation as an important lesson (although, maybe not a welcome one) can help you be more at peace with it. Ideally, our parents serve as guides for how to behave and interact with the world, and it’s easy to feel that the world “owes” us something if they weren’t. But they might also show us what mistakes not to repeat — and there’s value in those lessons as well.
9. “Detaching does not mean we don’t care. It means we learn to love, care, and be involved without going crazy.” ― Melody Beattie, Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
Sometimes, there’s simply nothing we can do at the moment to change the situation. And difficult as it may be, it’s okay to take a step back. There’s always hope in the future, but in the meantime, it’s fine (and maybe even necessary) to close certain doors.
Unfortunately, sometimes no matter what we do, the outcome can be tragic. Many have lost loved ones to addiction. Here are some quotes to cope with loss.
10. “Tears shed for another person are not a sign of weakness. They are a sign of a pure heart.” ― José N. Harris, Mi Vida: A Story of Faith, Hope and Love
The pain never completely goes away, and it’s never wrong to feel it. Try to see it as the evidence of love for the dear friend or family member who will always be with you in spirit.
11. “We are all the pieces of what we remember. We hold in ourselves the hopes and fears of those who love us. As long as there is love and memory, there is no true loss.” ― Cassandra Clare, City of Heavenly Fire
While it’s never wrong to feel our pain, it’s also never wrong to let it change and become a source of inspiration. The hardest experiences can transform into something meaningful with time.
12. “Life seems sometimes like nothing more than a series of losses, from beginning to end. That's the given. How you respond to those losses, what you make of what's left, that's the part you have to make up as you go.” ― Katharine Weber, The Music Lesson
Transcending pain is all about accepting the loss while making something meaningful out of the experience. For example, when (and if) you’re ready, you could be a lifeline for someone who is facing similar challenges.
Once dependence on a substance sets in, the addict’s personality and behaviors inevitably change. It can seem like all they want is to find their drug of choice — whether that’s a bottle of wine at the local store (or hidden in the hamper), a drug they bought from a seedy dealer, or even a prescription they lied about misusing. These quotes shed light on the situation.
13. “I have no power at all over people, places and things, and if I ever for a moment mistakenly believe that I do, and act as if I do, pain is on its way.” ― Russell Brand, Recovery: Freedom from Our Addictions
While this quote refers to the experience of an addict (who has recovered and is now helping others do the same!), it’s equally relevant to the experience of family and loved ones. For better or worse, what happens outside of our control isn’t up to us.
14. “We don’t have to take things so personally. We take things to heart that we have no business taking to heart. For instance, saying ‘If you loved me you wouldn’t drink’ to an alcoholic makes as much sense as saying ‘If you loved me, you wouldn’t cough’ to someone who has pneumonia.” ― Melody Beattie, Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
Remember how we said that addiction is a physical process that gains momentum without our control? Understanding the nature of addiction — so painful to witness and experience firsthand — can ultimately help us.
15. “Sometimes, no matter how hard we try for someone and hope that they will get better in time — they never do. Abusive relationships shouldn’t have a key to your chambers of heart. Hold your key and keep it close. Don’t end up getting addicted to such pain or human beings — for that matter. You might not be Thor but they can surely be Loki and hold you prisoner to their trickster nature.” ― Sijdah Hussain, Red Sugar, No More
It’s easier said than done to point out that the actions of others are not up to us to control. There’s always that small glimmer of hope that maybe “this time will be different.” And sometimes it is!
But the truth is, even if the situation doesn’t change, you have another important life to protect — your own. And that’s not only an option, it’s actually your most important responsibility.
In the end, addiction leaves a mark on everyone who experiences it — whether firsthand or as a witness. But there’s hope! Thousands of people (many of them part of the Reframe community) have found the light of recovery at the end of the tunnel and are leading happier, healthier lives than they ever thought possible. We wish you the best of luck on your journey. Remember, the Reframe community is here to support you along the way.
